Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the contemporary society people are dramtically shifting towards the modern cities for better and advanced living styles and much better career opportunities leaving the countysides with much lesss population.

Alot of people are now moving to big advanced cities in search of better jobs, business opprtunities or advanced lifestyle. This has reduced the population in countrysides impacting the local community system. This can impact the communities living in countrysides in many ways for instance, When many people migrate to bigger cities there would be less people to contribute to the local society and the demand would fall drastically for the locally produced goods directly impacting the local farmers and other small busniness's. Which can further cause decline in population due to work crises.

Furthermore, it can also lead to the bigger issues like employment crisses or tax contribution at a large scale .For example, when young people or educated people in general would migrate to bigger cities there would be less qualified people in countrysides for employment like less numbers of doctors or nurses can severly impact the medical system. On top of that less population means less tax money which will eventually impact the local community development in crucial fields like education, hospital or general community benefits from the government.

I firmly believe that it's a negative development since it has no considerabely positive outcomes for the countysides meanwhile it has many direct and indirect negative impacts like job crisis and less population and many more in the countryside.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you consider rural-to-urban migration negative, and you give relevant consequences, including reduced demand for local goods, harm to farmers and small businesses, shortages of doctors and nurses, and less funding for community services. This addresses the question and includes examples, with the healthcare point helping to extend your argument. However, some claims are asserted rather than fully explained: for instance, the link between falling demand and further population decline is mentioned briefly, and the conclusion mainly repeats the negative effects. To show more of the development expected at the next level, explain the causes and consequences of one or two examples in greater depth and acknowledge whether migration may bring any benefits before explaining why the disadvantages outweigh them.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The ideas generally progress from economic effects to shortages in public services, and signposts such as “Furthermore,” “For example,” and “I firmly believe” help readers follow the argument. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. The first body paragraph contains a long sequence of ideas joined by “which,” and the sentence beginning “This can impact the communities” shifts into an example without a clean boundary. The conclusion also repeats earlier points rather than drawing them together. Use shorter, clearly separated sentences, make references such as “this” precise, and link each example explicitly to the paragraph’s main claim to make progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “career opportunities,” “locally produced goods,” “qualified people,” and “community development.” These choices help communicate the main argument, and there is some variation beyond basic terms. However, spelling errors and inaccurate or unnatural word combinations are noticeable, including “dramtically,” “opprtunities,” “employment crisses,” and “tax contribution at a large scale.” Repetition of “bigger cities,” “less population,” and “impact” also limits precision. Choose standard forms such as “rural areas” and “urban centres,” and check collocations—for example, “a shortage of qualified staff” and “reduced tax revenue.” More accurate spelling and less repetitive phrasing would make your vocabulary more controlled and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and attempts at complex sentences, for example, the conditional structure “when young people or educated people … would migrate” and the clause explaining how fewer medical professionals affect healthcare. The overall meaning is usually understandable, but some sentence structures and punctuation need more control. The first body paragraph includes a sentence fragment beginning “Which can further cause decline,” while the sentence starting “For example, when young people…” is overloaded and difficult to follow. There are also errors in articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries, such as “less people” and the full stop spacing in “scale .For example.” Practise building complex sentences with a clear main clause, and proofread articles, plurals, and punctuation.

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