Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In our countries mostly rural side people moving to cities, so they affect on country population is decreasing. We explain a positive or negative development.

I thing some rural people are moving for better education to cities. Mostly people find a better gobs and better life style. Cities are very dirty air rather than village. Village is better than cities, because fresh air her and green field around all side. In city to much air pollution and sound pollution here, But city gave all facility, like good education and hospitals etc. All these facility can force rural people to moving cities. Cities gave us better road, parks and glass buildings, but village not gave us all these facilities.

On the other side negativity developed in cities. Population are increasing in cities, and generate many problems. Car parking is very big problem in the cities. Pollution level in cities are very high. All these problems affect on population in countryside is decreasing.

According to my experience, last year i went to Lahore city of Pakistan. I will see a large building here, and it has 200 apartments, in one apartment 10 person live here. No fresh air and clean water available here.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify relevant reasons for rural-to-urban migration, including access to education, jobs, hospitals and other facilities, and you give a personal example from Lahore. However, the task asks whether this is a positive or negative development, and your position is not clearly stated or maintained. You mention benefits of city life, then describe its disadvantages, but do not explain which side you consider more important. Several points are listed rather than developed, and the Lahore example does not clearly show how migration affects rural communities. The response is also 49 words below the required minimum. To improve, state your view directly, explain the consequences for both rural and urban areas, and develop each main reason with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

Your response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, a discussion of reasons for moving, a paragraph about urban problems, and a personal example. Linking phrases such as “On the other side” and “According to my experience” help signal changes in focus. However, the overall progression is not clear because the essay moves between the advantages of cities, the disadvantages of cities, and the decline in rural population without connecting these points to a consistent argument. Some links are also unclear, particularly “All these problems affect on population in countryside is decreasing.” Improve cohesion by organising paragraphs around a clear position and using linking sentences to show how each example supports it. Clearer references to what “these problems” means would also help.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a range of relevant topic vocabulary, including “education,” “hospitals,” “air pollution,” “parking,” and “apartments,” so the reader can understand the general subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes meaning difficult to follow. For example, “better gobs” appears to mean better jobs, while “glass buildings” and “sound pollution” are not the most natural expressions in this context. Repetition of “better,” “cities,” and “facilities” also limits precision. Build a more accurate set of phrases for migration and its effects, such as “employment opportunities,” “urban services,” and “pressure on infrastructure,” and check spelling and word forms before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some longer sentences using reasons and contrast, such as “Village is better than cities, because fresh air her and green field around all side,” but most sentence patterns remain simple and errors are frequent. Problems with subject–verb agreement, articles, plurals, and verb forms occur throughout: “Population are increasing,” “All these facility,” and “I will see a large building” make the intended meaning less clear. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent, as in the capitalised “But” after a comma. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with controlled clauses using “because,” “although,” and “which.” Pay particular attention to matching verbs to singular or plural subjects and keeping past-tense narration consistent.

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