Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nowadays, migration from rural areas to urban areas has become more common in many countries around the world. As a result, population of the countryside is gradually decreasing. Thus, this count to be a negative development, because it reduces the number of workers in rural areas and leads to overcrowding in cities.

To begin with, one of the major reasons is that rural areas lose workers and farmers when people move to cities. Because young people move to cities in search for better job opportunities and higher salaries. For example, instead of working is farms, young people may prefer to work in offices or factories in urban areas. As a result, agriculture production may decrease, which can negatively affect the supply of food and the development of rural communities.

Furthermore, this trend can create overcrowding and increase pressure on public services in cities. This is because a large number of people move to urban areas to fine better employment and living conditions. For instance, when too many people settle in cities, hospitals, schools and public transport may become overcrowded. As a result, people may face longer waiting times, higher living cost and lower quality of life. Therefore, the increasing migration of people from rural areas to cities can create serious problems for urban communities.

In conclusion, from my perspective the movement of people from rural areas to cities is a negative development because it reduces the rural workforce and creates overcrowding in urban areas. Therefore, government should create more job opportunities in villages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction—“this [is] a negative development”—and remains consistent in the conclusion. You address the question with two relevant reasons: the loss of rural workers and pressure on city services, supported by examples involving agriculture, hospitals, schools and transport. This fully covers the task’s main requirements. To develop the response further, explain the consequences in more depth and make the examples more specific; for instance, show how a shrinking rural workforce affects food production or community sustainability. The suggestion that governments create village jobs is relevant, but it is introduced only briefly. The response therefore has a clear, supported argument, while some ideas remain less fully developed than they could be.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay is organised effectively: the introduction states your view, each body paragraph develops a separate reason, and the conclusion restates your position and offers a response. Linking phrases such as “To begin with,” “Furthermore,” and “As a result” make the progression easy to follow. The examples are generally placed where they support the relevant point. Some connections are less smooth, however: “Because young people move to cities…” is a sentence fragment following the previous sentence, and repeated cause-and-effect transitions make parts of the argument feel somewhat formulaic. You could improve flow by joining related sentences and varying how you signal explanation and consequence. Overall, the organisation is clear and logical, with cohesion that is effective though not always flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “migration,” “job opportunities,” “agriculture production,” “public services,” and “overcrowding.” These choices communicate the main ideas clearly, and some phrases show an attempt to discuss social and economic effects. However, several word-choice or collocation errors reduce precision: “count to be” does not express your intended judgement, “fine better employment” appears to mean “find,” and “living cost” would normally be plural in this context. “Agriculture production” is also less natural than “agricultural production.” Repetition of “move to cities” and “urban areas” limits flexibility. Aim to use more precise collocations and check spelling and word forms; this would make the vocabulary more natural without changing your clear meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex forms, including clauses introduced by “when,” “because,” and “which,” and most sentences communicate their meaning clearly. Some grammatical errors remain. For example, “Because young people move to cities…” is a dependent clause presented as a complete sentence; it should be joined to the preceding sentence. In “population of the countryside,” an article is needed before “population,” and “government should create” needs an article or plural form. There are also errors in structures such as “instead of working is farms,” where the preposition is incorrect. These issues do not usually prevent understanding, but they affect accuracy. Practise complete sentence construction and check articles, agreement, and prepositions while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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