Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many parts of the world, significant number of people are moving towards cities from rural areas, in search of better life. I believe this is a positive development, because it improves your living standards.

Firstly, moving towards cities is good for better future, most people want quality education, for that they need modern school, collages and universities which are mostly available in urban areas. Alongside, for health issues mostly modern hospitals and other advanced technological products are rarely available in rural areas. So for getting better treatment people had to travel urban areas. As a result, people who moves to cities can gain better practical knowledge and skills, which can help them to build their better future.

Secondly, moving to cities provide people more career opportunities. In rural areas mostly people dependent on agricultural bussiness but on the other hand in cities people focusing on getting as much as they can get education and practical skills so they get better job and they can mostly earn more then those people who work's in rural areas. For example: In Pakistan for superior future mostly people aim to shift from rural areas to big cities such as Capital of the country Islamabad, lahore the mid of punjab and in Karachi which is the hub of pakistan economy.so they earn higher salaries and this allows them to support their famalies and improve their financial conditions.

In conclusion, although the movement from rural areas to cities may create problems such as overcrowding and traffic, but i believe this is a positive development overall. Better education, employment opportinities and access to modern facilities can help people for better future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you consider rural-to-urban migration positive, and the conclusion maintains this view while briefly acknowledging overcrowding and traffic. The main reasons—access to education and healthcare, followed by employment and higher earnings—are relevant and address the question. The Pakistan example adds useful support, particularly the reference to people moving to Islamabad, Lahore and Karachi for work. However, the education and healthcare points are grouped together and not fully explained, and the claim that city residents can build a better future is repeated rather than developed with specific consequences. To strengthen the response, explain more precisely how these benefits outweigh the pressures on cities and extend one or two examples further.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present reasons, and a conclusion restates your position. Sequencing phrases such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow. Some connections, however, feel mechanical, and the first body paragraph combines education, healthcare and future prospects without clearly separating their relationships. The long Pakistan example also moves quickly from naming cities to salaries and family finances, so the link between details could be clearer. There are occasional awkward transitions, such as “but on the other hand,” and the conclusion’s “although … but” construction weakens the sentence’s flow. Use clearer links between each claim, explanation and example, and vary the transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate your main ideas, including “quality education,” “career opportunities,” “agricultural business,” “overcrowding” and “financial conditions.” There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “advanced technological products,” though this is not a natural way to describe healthcare facilities or equipment. Repetition of “better” and “cities” limits flexibility, while several word-choice and spelling errors—“collages,” “bussiness,” “famalies” and “opportinities”—are noticeable. Phrases such as “for better future” and “the mid of Punjab” are also unclear or unnatural. Build a more precise range of collocations for education, healthcare and employment, and proofread spelling and word forms so the reader can follow your meaning more smoothly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a reason clause (“because it improves your living standards”) and a concession in the conclusion. The overall meaning is generally understandable, but errors in agreement, articles, verb forms and sentence construction recur. For example, “people who moves to cities can gain” should use a plural verb, and “moving to cities provide people” also needs subject–verb agreement. In “people had to travel urban areas,” the verb pattern and preposition are faulty; “people have to travel to urban areas” would be clearer. The final sentence uses both “although” and “but,” which should not be combined this way. Aim for accurate basic sentence patterns first, then use complex clauses with careful checking of agreement and verb forms.

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