Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's rapidly moving world, consequences of migration to cities is a matter of considerable debate. It is argued that the rural people from countruside in many countries are moving to cities. This essay agrees that this is a positive development because it provides access to better educational and healthcare system.

One of the primary reasons is that it provides rural people with better educational system. This is because in countryside, limited number of the schools are availlable and teaching practices are also not upto mark. For example, Blochistan is a rural province in the Pakistan and there are not enough number of schools available there and without proper supervision from state, quality of teaching methods is not good. Therefore, these people move to Islamabad for better educational opportunities. It is evident that moving to cities provide people with good educational system which leads to better employment options.

Secondly, migration to cities provides people with healthcare system with better facilities. Because in rural area, health facilities are very limited. For instance, in distant rural areas of Azad Kashmir, hospitals are located on distant. In case of emergencies, no immediate service os available which can cause health complications and even leads to the death of patient. Consequently, moving to cities can provide people opportunity to get treated at hospital with advanced technology located at a few minute drive away.

In conclusion, increasing migration to cities from rural areas is a positive development because it provides individuals opportunity to study in well developed educational system and get treated at good healthcare infrastructure.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you consider rural-to-urban migration positive because it improves access to education and healthcare. Both reasons are relevant, and the examples from Balochistan and Azad Kashmir help connect the argument to specific circumstances. The education paragraph also links schooling to later employment, giving that point some further development. However, the healthcare argument is less fully extended: you describe distance and emergency risks, but could explain more clearly how urban migration improves people’s long-term wellbeing or opportunities. The conclusion restates your view but adds little synthesis. To strengthen the response, develop the consequences of each example more evenly and acknowledge a relevant drawback before explaining why the benefits outweigh it.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay has a clear, effective structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs each present a main reason, and the conclusion returns to your position. The progression from education to healthcare is logical, and signposts such as “One of the primary reasons,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion” make the organisation easy to follow. Examples are generally placed where they support the relevant point. To make the flow more flexible, reduce reliance on formulaic transitions and strengthen links between claims and their consequences. For instance, the education paragraph moves from limited schools to migration and employment; a clearer sentence explaining each step would make that progression more seamless. The opening also repeats the prompt’s idea before the argument begins, so a more direct introduction could improve momentum.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-appropriate vocabulary, including “migration,” “educational opportunities,” “health facilities,” and “advanced technology,” and your meaning is generally understandable. However, the range is limited by repeated use of broad terms such as “better,” “good,” and “available,” and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors reduce precision. Examples include “countruside,” “availlable,” “upto mark,” and “healthcare system with better facilities.” Some phrases sound unnatural, such as “hospitals are located on distant” and “a few minute drive away.” Aim for more precise expressions for service access and quality, and check spelling and common word partnerships. This would make the vocabulary more flexible and natural without changing your clear central argument.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including explanations with “because,” examples introduced by “For example,” and a conditional phrase beginning “In case of emergencies.” The overall meaning remains clear, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “consequences of migration … is” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “the rural people … are moving” and “moving to cities provide” show inconsistent article or agreement control. There are also issues with articles and sentence construction in “in countryside” and “Because in rural area, health facilities are very limited.” Work on agreement, articles, and complete sentence patterns, and revise punctuation around sentence openings. More consistently accurate complex sentences would improve control while preserving the range you already attempt.

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