Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is certainly true that many people moving to city and leaving the village area worldwide. Many people thought that it is causing the decrease in the population in the villlage area and increasing number of people in the urban areas.I think this is a negitave development because it causes certian damages to the people who are already living in those areas.

The first reason of this is that if more people will move towards city it causes many tress to cut down and make place for the new houses; however, this is not only about the palce in cites. There are several other factors including the need of more jobs becuase in villages mostly people are connected to agriculture and farming.

so when they left village they have to do some other things to earn to fullfill their basic need; although there is another persepctive that in village there are not enough facilites. Including the healthcare and schooling, so as we know these kind of facilites are good enough in cities. For example, if we see the country like china they provide the basic needs to their people in the rural areas so they can live in their hometown. And they don,t need to leave for these basic needs.

To sum up with, we need to concentrate on the development of these facilities in rural areas, so that people don,t need to leave their homes for the things that are their basic right. In this way we can control the migration of the people from rural areas to urban areas.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you consider rural-to-urban migration negative, and you offer relevant points about pressure to build housing, the loss of agricultural workers, and limited rural services. The China example also supports your suggestion that better local provision could reduce migration. However, the response only partly develops the argument. The opening says migration causes “damages to the people who are already living in those areas,” but the essay does not explain who these people are or what specific harm they experience. The point about trees being cut down is also not clearly connected to the effects of migration. Develop each reason with a clear explanation and a specific consequence, while keeping your position consistent throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction to reasons, an example, and a concluding recommendation. Some linking expressions, such as “For example” and “To sum up,” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, progression within the body is difficult to follow: the paragraph shifts from housing and jobs to leaving villages, then to healthcare and schooling without clearly showing how these points connect. The sentence beginning “so when they left village” is also separated from the preceding idea in a way that weakens the flow. Use clearer paragraphing for distinct reasons and connect each claim to its explanation with accurate, less mechanical transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “agriculture,” “healthcare,” “rural areas,” and “migration,” which helps communicate the subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “damages to the people,” “the first reason of this,” and “earn to fullfill their basic need.” Spelling errors—including “negitave,” “villlage,” and “facilites”—are noticeable and reduce the overall control of vocabulary. Aim to use precise phrases for causes and consequences, and check spelling carefully. Replacing repeated general wording with accurate terms such as “rural residents,” “employment opportunities,” and “public services” would make the argument clearer and more appropriate for an academic essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional structure (“if more people will move towards city”) and a contrast introduced by “however.” These attempts show some range, but complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make parts of the argument harder to follow. For example, “many people moving to city” lacks a finite verb and an article, while “if more people will move” uses an unsuitable verb form for this conditional. There are also problems with sentence boundaries and punctuation, particularly the fragment “Including the healthcare and schooling.” Practise complete sentence structures, conditional forms, articles, and punctuation, then proofread each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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