Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowadays many people are moving to cities are positive effects, In most countries all over world village strength of people shifting to cities so the number of people in the countryside is decreasing the people. I agree and this is a positive thought.

In one hand the population of rural livers think that they will upgrade their lifestyle and make more money in large cities because the talent they have they can earn much money in city according to village dimension for example if the person holds a business so the customers are limited in particular area from this they cant make a profit but in city you will get populer and marketing upgration in business. Therefore the thinking of people is right towards them

On the other hand, The childrens will increase their education ecosystem and build their future bright also their certificates have a nice value to improve their higher studies. For Example if a child completes graduation and search for a job the companies and vacancies have chance to achieve their further studied jobs and change the ecosystem of the family in financial status. This essay has a positive mindset and moving forwards in futures.

In conclusion, While many countries around the world, Rural people are moving to cities, So the population in the countryside is decreasing, The situation according to me is very nice and beneficial to every family but I dont want to say village livers are wrong its about upgration to education,business and lifestyle.This may ensures that some people have to change their mindset.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a clear overall view that rural-to-urban migration is positive and offer relevant reasons, especially the possibility of earning more through a larger market and accessing better education and jobs. However, the position is not consistently expressed clearly, and these points remain under-developed: the business example is difficult to follow, while the education paragraph does not explain in detail how moving itself improves opportunities. The conclusion repeats your view but adds little support. The response is also below the required 250 words: 241 words, with 19 words copied from the prompt excluded from the count. Develop each reason with a clearer explanation and a specific, relevant example to address the task more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “In one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This helps readers identify your two main reasons. However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear: the business example moves from limited customers to profit and then to popularity without clearly connecting these ideas. Some linking phrases are mechanical or inaccurate, and the conclusion largely repeats the prompt rather than drawing the argument together. Improve cohesion by arranging each paragraph around one main point, then explaining it and giving an example. Use transitions only where they show a clear relationship, and make references such as “This essay” or “This” precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “lifestyle,” “customers,” “certificates,” and “financial status,” and you communicate the broad ideas of work and education. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make meaning difficult to follow. For example, “rural livers” is not a natural way to refer to people in the countryside, “marketing upgration” is unclear, and “education ecosystem” does not express the intended idea precisely. Spelling and word-form errors such as “populer” and “upgration” also affect clarity. Build a bank of accurate topic phrases and check that each word fits its context; prefer straightforward, precise wording over unfamiliar expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a conditional example beginning “if the person holds a business” and a sentence explaining the possible effect on a family’s finances. However, the range is limited, and complex attempts are often faulty, so readers sometimes have to work to understand the relationships between ideas. For instance, “many people are moving to cities are positive effects” combines sentence structures incorrectly, while “the talent they have they can earn” lacks a clear grammatical connection. There are also recurring problems with agreement, articles, sentence boundaries, and punctuation, as in “The childrens will increase.” Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a clearly attached supporting clause, then proofread for these patterns.

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