Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, people from countryside are migrating towards cities for better opportunities. As a result, the number of dwellers in rural areas is declining day by day. In my opinion, this movement might cause a negative impact related to economic and living standard for many nations whereas I also acknowledge the fact that the whole migration process can bring a industrial revolution by creating employment to some extent.

On the one hand, the tendency to move towards the metropolis among the rural people arises from the urge to have better opportunities such as education, health care and most importantly, to have a well-established career. However, it often creates a great disorder in cities with an increasing number of population as urban areas cannot accommodate such number of people. The main problem occurs when the lack of accommodation leads people to live in slum-sized communities with the living condition of below average as people struggle to have proper security, water supplies, sufficient space for large families and other fundamental needs. Thus, the standard of living condition in cities deteriorates with the increasing number of people. In addition, national economy often relies on our agriculture, and when rural people are moving away from this, economical downfall can be noticed with a struggle to meet the necessity the food supplies across the nation which make the migration more negative om its own.

However, it should also be recognized that a nation can move towards an industrial and urban revolutionary change when most people tend to choose metropolis as their foundation of career. In most cases, increasing industrialization creates greater work opportunitites; for example, garment industries are seen to be thriving in home and abroad with a large number of employees. Therefore, the economical base can transform from agriculture to industries by making more profit from this sector which often leads to the possible betterment of living condition.

To conclude, it can be said that the migration takes a negative turn when people cannot attain what they expect to have in cities and fail to measure the economical downfall in most cases. However, it can be looked at from a positive perspective as industrialization can make an another area of gaining economic profits.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and give a clear overall view that the development is mainly negative, while recognising that migration may support industrial growth. The discussion of overcrowding, inadequate housing and pressure on food production is relevant, and the garment-industry example helps illustrate the potential benefit. However, the positive case is less fully explained: the link between people moving to cities and improved living conditions is asserted rather than demonstrated. Some claims, such as the effect on national food supplies, would also benefit from a clearer explanation or a specific example. Develop each main point with a cause-and-effect explanation and make your final judgement more decisive about why the disadvantages outweigh the benefits.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the negative and positive effects, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “However,” and “To conclude” makes the direction of the argument easy to follow. This meets the lower-band expectations and shows some features of stronger progression, particularly in the paragraph about urban overcrowding. At times, though, connections are mechanical or the reference is unclear. For example, “when rural people are moving away from this” leaves “this” imprecise, and the final paragraph repeats the two-sided structure without clearly weighing the arguments. Use more precise referencing and connect each example directly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “rural areas,” “accommodation,” “industrialization,” “agriculture,” and “economic profits.” There are also attempts at less common expressions, such as “industrial revolution” and “economical downfall,” but some choices or collocations are inaccurate or unnatural. For instance, “industrial revolution” suggests a specific historical-scale transformation, while “slum-sized communities” does not express the intended idea naturally. Spelling errors such as “opportunitites” and “om” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, natural combinations rather than more elaborate wording, and check spelling and word forms during proofreading.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including subordinate clauses beginning “when” and “as,” and most of the argument remains understandable. Some grammatical errors occur, but they rarely prevent the reader from following your meaning. Examples include missing articles in “people from countryside” and “a industrial revolution,” and agreement problems in “which make the migration more negative.” The sentence beginning “The main problem occurs when” also becomes difficult to manage because several needs are listed within it. Review articles, subject–verb agreement and sentence boundaries, and consider splitting long sentences so that each cause and consequence is expressed clearly.

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