Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In recent years, there has long been debate over whether urban migration is a positive or negetive develpoment. While urban migration provides many facilities such as education, health and accomodation, i believe its largely a negetive trend because rural population will decline. This essay will examine the principal reasons why this trend is a negetive development before concluding that how it impacts on people's life.

One of the most principal reasons is that this trend will decline the rural population. If the population has declined, it will has to seen that we have to face shortage of labour and food, While we will feel shortage of labour or worker they it is clear that it turns out as a problem for all. Not only food but also rural popluration will fell into zero, As a result the balanced will deminished.

On the other hand, another significant reason is that cities is going to be disaster for all. The traffic jam will increased rapidly, along with environmental issues. In job sectors, people might have to face more difficulties. Furthermore, Unemployment will increased and will be seen shortage of house.

In conclusion, i firmly believe that this trend is a negetive development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You state a clear view that rural-to-urban migration is negative, and you identify relevant consequences, including labour and food shortages in rural areas and traffic, unemployment, and housing pressure in cities. However, the response addresses the task only partially: these points are mostly asserted rather than explained or supported with examples, and the claim that the rural population could “fell into zero” is not convincingly developed. The introduction also promises to explain effects on people’s lives, but the body does not fully deliver this. The response is 50 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop your reasons. Explain the cause-and-effect links and add a specific example for each main point.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting different consequences, and a conclusion that restates your position. Linking phrases such as “On the other hand,” “Furthermore,” and “As a result” help signal relationships between points. However, progression within the paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the first body paragraph moves from population decline to labour, food, and balance without explaining how these ideas connect. Some transitions are also mechanical, and the contrast marker “On the other hand” is not fully supported because the second paragraph adds another negative consequence rather than presenting an opposing view. Use clearer topic sentences and develop each point in a logical sequence, with references that make the links between sentences explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “urban migration,” “rural population,” “traffic jam,” “environmental issues,” and “unemployment.” This gives the response enough basic language to communicate its main concerns. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making meaning difficult to follow: “the balanced will deminished” and “cities is going to be disaster for all” are unclear. Spelling errors such as “negetive,” “develpoment,” and “popluration” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, natural combinations such as “the balance will be disrupted” and “cities may face serious problems,” and check spelling carefully. Repeating “negative development” could also be avoided with suitable alternatives.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional sentence beginning “If the population has declined” and a contrast structure with “While.” However, complex attempts are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to understand. For example, “it will has to seen” has an incorrect verb construction, while “cities is going to be disaster” has problems with agreement and article use. In “Unemployment will increased,” the verb form after “will” is incorrect. There are also sentence-boundary and punctuation problems, such as the comma splice and capitalisation in “food, While.” Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and modal verb patterns, then build longer sentences only when you can control their structure.

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