Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Population of cities is increasing nowadys, idividuals of many coutries are moving toword the big cities that's why population of rural areas is declinging. It is a negative situation due to this reasion problems like pollution and traffic isssues are also increasing. This essay will discuss how increasing population of cities is a negative situation.

One of the major problem is pollution due to incresase population of cities the number ofvehicals also grown. Vehicals are polluting the air with harmful gases moreover, it is effecting humans lungs and become a reasion of many mental and physical issues. For instance, in Lahore due to over population we are facing pollution problem desible level of has crossed the lemit consequently we need overcome it.

Another problem is traffic due to larg nuber of vehicals. It is cause horrible accidents and wast of importent time. Many people loss their live's due to this reasion. For instance, in Dubai we faced many accidents. Moreover, it is also increasing inflation because because we can not fulfil their needs without transportation. For instance, to feed all individuals of a overpopulated city need food in heavy quantity, so we gring it from other cities and it became overprice so, it is a negative situstion.

In my opinion, we imeditly focus on this probelm. Government should set a lemit of house making in every city further, if we provide all facilities in rural areas than people will not leave their village.

To sum up, it effects on human live's through pollution and traffic problem, so we have need to stop it by providing facilities in all areas of the country.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you consider rural-to-urban migration negative, and you address the question by discussing pollution and traffic, then suggesting that services be improved in rural areas. The examples of Lahore and Dubai help make the discussion relevant. However, some points are not fully explained or are unclear. For example, the link between transport and inflation is asserted through the need to bring food from other cities, but the explanation does not show clearly how migration causes this outcome. The proposed limit on house-building also needs justification and may not directly address why people leave rural areas. Develop each main idea with a clearer cause-and-effect explanation and ensure examples directly support it.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting problems, and a conclusion with a recommendation. This makes your main position easy to identify. You also use linking expressions such as “For instance,” “Moreover,” and “To sum up.” At times, however, connections are mechanical or unclear. In the second body paragraph, the move from accidents to inflation is abrupt, and repeated use of “Moreover” and “For instance” does not always show the precise relationship between ideas. Some references, such as “it” in “it is also increasing inflation,” could be clearer. Use topic sentences to guide each paragraph and connect supporting details explicitly to the main point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “pollution,” “harmful gases,” “traffic,” “transportation,” and “overpopulated,” so the reader can follow the subject. There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “desible level” and “house making,” but inaccurate spelling and word choice make these difficult to understand. Errors such as “vehicals,” “declinging,” “lemit,” and “overprice” are noticeable, while phrases like “pollution problem” and “traffic problem” are repeated rather than varied. Some combinations are unnatural, for example “feed all individuals of a overpopulated city.” Build accuracy with common collocations and check spelling carefully; this will make your ideas clearer and give you more flexibility in discussing causes and effects.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a cause-and-effect structure with “due to” and a conditional idea in “if we provide all facilities in rural areas.” This shows some range, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, some sentence structures and grammatical forms are inaccurate. For example, “the number of vehicals also grown” needs a correctly formed verb, and “Many people loss their live's” has errors in verb form and plural construction. There are also problems with agreement and articles, as in “One of the major problem” and “a overpopulated city.” Several long sentences join multiple ideas without clear punctuation, particularly in the paragraph about traffic and inflation. Practise accurate sentence boundaries and check agreement, articles, and verb forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.