Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Introduction

It is argued that in many countries around the world,rural people are moving to cities,so the population in the countryside is decreasing.Some people believe that it is beneficial for the economy as much people move to city more property will sale and it increase income.Whereas this essay disagrees with this statement.

Part 1

the paramount reason is that if all people move to cities then there is no one to look over the village and crops and there are no grain for the population of country due to which government have to import the grain from other countries which cost so much because that they have to take loan from other countries.For example if all individuals move to cities than the village also start turning into the cities and than there is no land to produce grain and no one is available to take care of them which lead the country into a serious problem.

Part 2

Another reason is that rural area are the beauty of country.But due to lack of facilities people start moving towards the cities its the duty of government to provide that facilities to solve the problem otherwise it lead to serious problem.for instant, if government provide basic facilities like electricity,internet,grocery store ,hospital and educational system than the increasing population of cities can be reduce very much.

Conclusion

In conclusion,its depend on government of that country if they want they can control that by providing basic facilities.By which country can prevent many problems which can lead to its disaster.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You take a clear negative position, especially through the claims that rural depopulation could reduce grain production and that governments should improve rural services. These points are relevant, but they are only partly developed: the link between fewer farmers, food imports and national debt is asserted rather than explained, and the second paragraph focuses more on what government should do than on the effects of people leaving. The introduction also mentions an economic benefit, but does not clearly distinguish that opposing view from your own position. The response contains 238 words, so it is 12 words below the required minimum; this limits the space available to develop and support your ideas. Add a specific example and explain the consequences more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and each body paragraph presents a separate reason. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow. For example, the first body paragraph moves from village care to grain imports, loans and villages becoming cities without clearly showing how each point connects. Linking words such as “Whereas,” “Another reason” and “For example” help signal relationships, but some are used inaccurately or mechanically, and the conclusion largely repeats the recommendation to provide facilities rather than summarising the argument. Develop each paragraph around one main claim, then explain it in a clear sequence with precise referencing.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “population,” “rural area,” “facilities,” “import” and “educational system,” which allows the main ideas to be understood. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are noticeably inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning less clear. Examples include “look over the village and crops,” “there are no grain,” “more property will sale” and “the beauty of country.” Spelling and word forms also need attention, as in “than” where “then” is intended and “reduce” where “reduced” is needed. Build a bank of accurate phrases for agriculture, migration and public services, and check that each verb and noun fits its context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if all people move to cities” and a clause beginning “which lead the country into a serious problem.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some relationships difficult to follow. For instance, “as much people move to city more property will sale” has problems with agreement, articles and verb form; “rural area are” also shows a subject–verb agreement error. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are inconsistent, particularly where full stops are missing before “for instant” and “otherwise.” Practise building shorter, accurate sentences first, then combine them using correctly formed clauses and check agreement, articles and punctuation.

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