Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born.

What might be the reasons for this?

What are the advantages and disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Most of the individuals like to stay in their hometown where they born for liftime while do not believe in this.The upcoming paragraphs will discuss the main causes of this mentality including how people attached to their roots and families and will discuss the main demerits including they how miss out the new job opportunities and the chance to explore new culture.

On the one hand,Folks stayed to their birth land for life time because they do not want to get detached from their family and roots.When people stay out of their hometown, it contribute to their next generation to get deatach more easily from their traditions and culture.For example, according to the recent study of Harvard,the ration of immigration people of asians are more likely to adapt the western culture than who are staying in the Asian countries.As a result of this,people are more afraid to take their kids to overseas.

On the other hand, people are stuck to their hometowns and miss out the opportunities like to explore the new culture and good career opportunity.when people do not miss the leave their families

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify a relevant reason—attachment to family, roots, traditions and culture—and begin to discuss disadvantages such as missing career opportunities and exposure to other cultures. However, the response addresses the task only partially: the advantages of staying near one’s birthplace are not clearly explained, and the disadvantages are introduced but not developed. The final sentence, “when people do not miss the leave their families,” is incomplete, so the discussion stops before the second part is properly answered. The Harvard example is relevant in intention, but its connection to the claim is unclear. The response is also 65 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to explain and support the ideas. Develop both sides and give a clear, complete example for each.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an introduction is followed by two body paragraphs, and “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” signal a contrast. This gives the reader some sense of direction. However, the overall progression is incomplete because the second body paragraph ends abruptly, and the introduction promises both causes and disadvantages without clearly setting out the advantages. Some links between ideas are difficult to follow, particularly the move from family attachment to the claim about children adapting to Western culture. Connect each explanation explicitly to the main point, and use a concluding sentence to complete the discussion. A fuller, balanced paragraph structure would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “hometown,” “traditions,” “culture,” “immigration” and “career opportunity.” These choices show that you can communicate the main subject and attempt more specific language. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate or awkward expressions make parts of the response difficult to understand, such as “birth land,” “the ration of immigration people” and “miss out the opportunities like to explore.” Spelling errors such as “deatach” and “life time” also reduce clarity. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. For example, “remain close to their roots” and “access to better employment opportunities” would express your ideas more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a reason clause beginning “because” and a conditional structure with “When people stay out of their hometown.” This shows some effort to vary sentence forms. However, errors are frequent, and some sentences are difficult to interpret. Examples include “where they born,” “it contribute,” and “people do not miss the leave their families,” which show problems with verb forms, agreement and sentence construction. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and a run-on introduction. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement and tense. Breaking longer ideas into shorter, accurate sentences would improve readability.

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