Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Average monthly change in prices of copper, nickel and zinc (2014)

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The line chart tracks the fluctuations of prices of three different metals like copper, nickel and zinc during 2014.

To conclude, expenses of nickel and copper fell as compared to last month price. But a little increase was seen in the purchase of zinc over the month.

to commence, nickel was the most expensive material among all three metals in the starting of the month which was 6% in month J, then its price kisses the ground neatly to -3 percent, by the end of the month it increases to 1 percent overall. Moreover, Zinc and Copper materials shows approximately same trend, in starting price of Nickel rises from 1 to 3% and a drop was recorded from 3 to -1 percent. furthermore, both the materials that is Zinc and copper shows a constant vale.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. Furthermore, the summary is incomplete and inaccurate. The description of the data is confusing, particularly the reference to 'month J' and the inconsistent reporting of the trends. The overview provided in the conclusion is vague and does not clearly highlight the main features or significant differences between the metals. To improve, you must ensure all data points are accurately interpreted and that you provide a clear, concise summary of the overall trends rather than listing individual fluctuations in a disjointed manner.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The essay lacks a logical structure. The paragraphing is inappropriate, with the conclusion placed before the body paragraph. Cohesive devices are used incorrectly or in a mechanical fashion, such as 'to commence' and 'furthermore', which do not help the flow of ideas. The progression of information is difficult to follow because the data is presented in a fragmented way without clear links between the metals or the time periods. You need to organize your report into a clear introduction, an overview of the main trends, and detailed body paragraphs that compare the data logically.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is limited and often inappropriate for an academic report. Phrases like 'kisses the ground' are informal and unsuitable for IELTS Academic Task 1. There are also issues with word choice, such as using 'expenses' instead of 'prices' or 'fluctuations'. The repetition of basic terms like 'materials' and 'price' indicates a limited range. To reach a higher band, you should use more precise terminology related to data description, such as 'decreased', 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a downward trend'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('Zinc and Copper materials shows'), incorrect preposition usage, and awkward sentence construction. The range of structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences that are often poorly formed. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with capitalization and comma usage. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures and ensuring that your verbs agree with their subjects. Proofreading for basic errors is essential before submitting your work.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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