Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Average monthly change in prices of copper, nickel and zinc (2014)

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given bar graph depicts the information about the change in cost of different metals every month in year 2004.

Overall, it is clear that the price of Nickel metal was drastically changed within the year.

Having a myopic glance, it can be seen that from January to Februrary the price of nickel changed by 2% and then by 3% in month of March. Moreover, between march to may the rates changed by approximately 1% while in June the cost declined by 4% and remain continous by -1% from june to october.and rose by 3% and then remain constant till December. Fuerthermore, there was a differnce between the price of copper and zinc in January by 1% and decreased by 2% in February. Whereas from march to june the rates between these metals were almost same by 0.5% and changed by 1.5% from june to october.

On addition, in december the change in rate of zinc was 1.5% and the price of copper had changed by 1% in year 2004 respectivily.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response attempts to address the task by describing changes in metal prices, but it contains several significant shortcomings. First, the student misidentifies the visual prompt, referring to a 'bar graph' instead of a line graph, and cites the incorrect year as '2004' instead of '2014'. Furthermore, the reporting of specific data points contains numerous inaccuracies and confusion between the trends of the different metals. While an overall trend is attempted, the selection of main features is disjointed, and the numbers cited do not accurately reflect the provided graph data. Consequently, the response only partially addresses the requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay displays some structural organisation with an introduction and body paragraphs, but the overall progression is difficult to follow. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, such as 'Having a myopic glance' and 'On addition', which sound unnatural and do not contribute to smooth transitions. Paragraphing is attempted, but the grouping of information is confusing, jumping between different metals and timeframes without clear logical links. Referencing between pronouns and the subjects they refer to is also frequently unclear, impacting the readability of the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is generally basic and repetitive, with noticeable errors in word choice and collocation. Phrases such as 'drastically changed', 'cost declined', and 'remain continous' demonstrate a limited control of lexical items suitable for academic writing. There are also spelling errors ('Februrary', 'Fuerthermore', 'differnce', 'respectivily') and inaccurate terminology, such as confusing 'bar graph' for 'line graph'. The range is minimally adequate to convey a basic message, but lexical inaccuracy frequently impedes smooth communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control over grammar is weak. There are frequent errors in tense usage, prepositions, and sentence structure, such as 'the rates changed by approximately 1% while in June the cost declined by 4% and remain continous by -1%'. Punctuation errors are also present, including missing capitalisation and run-on sentences with incorrect conjunctions. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader and prevent the text from achieving a higher band score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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