Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Average monthly change in prices of copper, nickel and zinc (2014)
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The paragraph shows a comparison between three of the metals products in a shape of copper, nickel and zinc for price flactuation in 30days . More importantly, it gives a precise figure about period of 30 days time and gives a some sort of indicator regarding how the proves went from low to high to each of the metal. Copper shows a steady line in the starting but it went high as the days passes as compared to others, it can seen in number 6 shown of picture. Whereas Nickel remain in mid range and Zinc were among the paw, it performed best among them as it inclined to low levels.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0
The response recognises that the graph compares copper, nickel and zinc, but it does not accurately summarise the main features. The claim that copper “went high as the days passes” is misleading: copper mostly fluctuated around small positive and negative changes, while nickel began highest and fell sharply to about -3% in June. The statement that nickel “remain in mid range” misses this major movement, and the description of zinc as performing best by “inclined to low levels” is unclear and inconsistent with its recovery to positive changes near the end. There is no clear, accurate overview or reliable selection of comparisons. The response is also 39 words below the required minimum, leaving too little development to cover the graph adequately. Focus on the overall pattern and support it with key figures.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
There is a basic attempt to organise the response: it introduces the three metals and then comments on each, using “Whereas” to signal a comparison. However, the ideas do not progress clearly from an overview to supporting details, and the final comparisons are difficult to follow. For example, “Copper shows a steady line in the starting” is followed by an unclear claim about it going high, while the nickel and zinc descriptions do not explain how their trends compare over the year. Some linking is attempted, but “More importantly” does not introduce a clearly relevant main feature, and “Whereas” begins a fragment-like continuation. Use separate paragraphs for an overview and key details, and connect comparisons with precise references to months and changes.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The response uses some relevant topic vocabulary, including “comparison,” “price,” “steady line,” and “inclined,” showing an attempt to describe trends. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the meaning unclear. “Metal products in a shape of” is not a natural way to introduce the series, “price flactuation” is misspelled and imprecise, and “Zinc were among the paw” appears to be an incorrect or unintelligible phrase. “Proves” also seems to be an unintended word in “how the proves went.” Choose standard graph language such as “percentage change,” “rose,” “fell,” and “fluctuated,” and check spelling and collocations carefully. More precise vocabulary would make the comparisons easier to understand.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response attempts a few longer sentence forms, including a comparison introduced by “Whereas,” and uses present-tense verbs to describe the graph. However, control is inconsistent, and several grammatical errors affect clarity. In “as the days passes,” the subject and verb do not agree; “it can seen” is missing “be”; and “Nickel remain” and “Zinc were” have incorrect agreement. The opening sentence also has an awkward, incomplete construction, and the sentence beginning “Whereas” is not smoothly integrated with the preceding sentence. Work on subject–verb agreement, auxiliary verbs, and complete sentence structure. Shorter, accurate sentences would help communicate the trends before attempting more complex comparisons.
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