Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Recently, companies have changed the hiring process and like to ask some more personal questions. Nowadays, employee need to add additional personal information like hobbies and interests as well as they are married or single while applying for job to companies because few employers saying that these kind of information is helpful and applicable, however, some disagree about this. This essay will shed a light on both the views and then I will share my opinion as well.

On the one hand, some companies believe while hiring candidates they should include their personal information like what things like to do in and what their interests. By adding these information, it is useful to employers as they will able to find right candidate for the work, they will give certain task to the employee which employee is comfortable to complete it. For example, when employee mentions their hobbies like creativity, good coding skills, logical learning, playing mind games, active in sports; by adding using information, it will help employer to allocate task accordingly. Employer know that employee is logical thinking person and he is physically active, so they will allocate that type of project. Not only this will help employee to performance well and achieve task but it also beneficial for the company's development and growth. Also, by adding information like married or single in resume, this also help employers know that employee will be able to do overtime, or employee will be ready to help company whenever there is an urgent client requirement to complete task.

On the other hand, employees should not share their interest and hobbies with their employer, as they are fear of judgement, as well they are under to prove themselves. For example, if employee has hobby of dancing and singing which has no co-relation with company in which they are working. If employee has not performed well to achieve task, then there is fear of judge, that employers will think that this employee is not worthy for the company. In addition, when employer knows that employee is married then they know that employee has both responsibility professional and personal. Organization feels that employee will be not available when there is an urgent need of achieve task due to their personal responsibilities. Employees are being judge by sharing additional information rather than judging based on their skills and knowledge.

To sum up, some believe employees should share their personal interest information and whether they are married or single to employers while other not. As per my opinion, employers should not emphasize on additional information of hobbies and interests as well as married or single, rather than they should look for skills and knowledge which will help for the development of organization.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both sides of the argument and providing a clear personal opinion in the conclusion. The ideas are relevant, such as the potential for better task allocation versus the risk of bias and judgment. However, some arguments are slightly repetitive, particularly the discussion regarding marital status and overtime. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully extended with more nuanced reasoning rather than restating the same concept. The position is consistent throughout, and the essay structure is logical, meeting the requirements for a balanced discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'To sum up,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical, and there are instances where referencing is slightly unclear, such as 'by adding using information' in the second paragraph. The flow of ideas is generally logical, but the connection between sentences could be smoother to avoid a repetitive feel. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different viewpoints.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'allocate,' 'development,' and 'professional responsibilities.' However, there are several instances of awkward collocations and word choice errors, such as 'few employers saying' instead of 'some employers say' and 'fear of judge' instead of 'fear of being judged.' The range is sufficient to communicate, but more precise and varied vocabulary would be needed to reach a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('employee need to add,' 'Employer know') and article usage. Some sentences are slightly disjointed due to these errors. While the writer attempts complex structures, they are often marred by minor inaccuracies. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical consistency, such as pluralization and verb tense agreement, which would significantly enhance the overall clarity and professionalism of the writing.

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