Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

There is an ongoing debate regarding whether interviewers should ask candidate about personal details like their hobbies, interest and their marital status. There are devided opinions. A group of individuals react positively towards this trend and say that such data may be relevant and useful; However, other are denied this trend.

Discussing the former view, supporters believe that candidate's personal life information helps employers to understand the skills and abilities of interviewee. Hobbies and interests express person's life style as well as their nature. Moreover, marital status significantly affects people proffesional and working life that is why many business and companis are ask for such information. For instance

Candidates who have interest in leadership, problem solving and calculation are prioritize by employees. Person who pursue thir hobbies are considered more passionate and enthusiastic. Through marital status information interviewers measures abilities and dedication of applicant. Married person have more responsibility then single one so married candidates may not justify their job role as unmarried applicants. Consequently personel information of interviewees in regards of their interest, hobbies and marital status is play important role to understand candidate's abilities and dedication.

On the other hand many individuals have opposite view towards this trend because of security purpose. Some applicant do not want to reveal their pesonel life details due to risk of misused. Some people want to keep their personal and proffesional life separate; moreover, some persons have fear of other's judgements in regards of their pesonal life. for excample, private information like marital status or personal interests are slightly sensitive

topics. so many people avoid to discuss it. People think that candidates have selected on basis their abilities, talent and qualification rather than their hobbies, interest or marital status. personal information is not that important as proffetional qualities of person. so it is irrelevanet to ask pesonel details in ricruitment process.

To conclude, Although some individuals argue that personel information asked during recruitment process such as interst, hobbies and marital status is irrelevant and risky, such information helps employers to understand candidate's dedication, skills, abilities and enthusiasm. If ask only relavant information rather then too personal details ,with maintaining security is more effective.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have addressed all parts of the prompt by discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. Your ideas are relevant, such as the mention of security concerns and the desire for professional boundaries. However, some arguments are under-developed or contain logical leaps, such as the claim that marital status directly correlates with dedication or job performance. To improve, ensure your supporting examples are more concrete and logically sound. For instance, instead of generalizing about married versus single employees, focus on how such questions might be perceived as discriminatory or irrelevant to actual job performance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use some cohesive devices like 'Moreover', 'Consequently', and 'On the other hand' to transition between ideas. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as the abrupt start to the second paragraph with 'For instance' followed by a new thought. Additionally, some sentences are fragmented or lack smooth flow, which occasionally disrupts the logical progression of your argument. Improving the variety and precision of your linking words will help your writing feel more natural and cohesive.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'recruitment process', 'professional qualities', and 'sensitive topics'. However, there are frequent spelling errors (e.g., 'devided', 'proffesional', 'companis', 'pesonel', 'ricruitment') and some word choice inaccuracies (e.g., 'other are denied this trend' instead of 'others disagree with this trend'). These errors are noticeable and occasionally distract the reader, though they do not fully impede communication. To reach a higher band, focus on proofreading for common spelling mistakes and expanding your use of collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but your writing is marred by frequent grammatical errors. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'many business and companis are ask'), article usage, and sentence fragments (e.g., 'For instance' standing alone). While the meaning is generally clear, these errors occur throughout the text and require the reader to re-read certain parts to grasp the intended message. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and ensuring that your verbs and subjects agree, as well as refining your use of articles and prepositions.

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