Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Some companies ask job applicants about personal details. While some believe this is helpful, others think it is unnecessary. in my opinion, it is important for companies to have information.
On the one hand, some people argue that personal questions are not related to work.They believe that employers should focus on a candidates skills and qualifications as well as confidence. For example, whether some people cannot share personal information to other people because they haven't satisfaction and they maintain privacy.
on the other side, I believe that this information is very useful for employers.
Firstly, company can know workers hobbies and about personality. they show the communication and team management skills. For instance, some people who plays in team sports may work very well in a group. secondly, Marital status can be relevant for her ability and work experience that require and position available of his performance. Therefore, have full details of employers they are helpful for the company and his workers.
In conclusion, although some people disagree,
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 168 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you have attempted to address both sides of the argument and state an opinion, the ideas are underdeveloped and lack sufficient supporting evidence. For instance, the argument regarding marital status is vague and lacks a clear connection to job performance. Because the response is incomplete and the conclusion is cut off, the task is only partially addressed. To improve, you must expand your arguments with specific examples and ensure the essay is fully developed to meet the length requirement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inaccurate, such as the transition 'on the other side' which is less standard than 'on the other hand'. The progression of ideas is hindered by the abrupt ending of the essay. Referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the third paragraph where the connection between marital status and job performance is difficult to follow. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, logical flow that leads to a complete conclusion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for basic communication but lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. There are instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'haven't satisfaction' and 'have full details of employers they are helpful'. You rely on simple, repetitive language. To achieve a higher score, you should aim to use more precise collocations and academic vocabulary. For example, instead of 'know workers hobbies', you could use 'gain insight into an applicant's personal interests'. Expanding your range of vocabulary will help you express complex ideas more effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There is a mix of simple and some attempted complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. Frequent errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'company can know', 'some people who plays') and article usage (e.g., 'in team sports') are present. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and capitalization errors at the start of sentences. While these errors do not always prevent understanding, they are frequent enough to impede the flow of the text. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy and proofreading for sentence structure will significantly improve your writing.
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