Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Most of the time employers are willing to have the personal information of the applying candidate such as their hobbies, field of interest and their status of relationship. I agree with this, because they can know more about that person and how this will affect his work, and the workplace around him. On the other hand, some of does not agree to provide this information because they don't feel comfortable or they are willing to express to any other person.

Collecting this kind of information helps the employer and the employee. As organization can provide break out period, and they can arrange special events to reduce the stress and to improve the productivity of the employees. With the help of this information a event or some stress free activity can be arranged that will be beneficial for everyone, and all of them can have something to do that align with their hobbies and interest. For example, If most of the employees are interest in sports like Cricket and Football. A sports event can be held to reduce stress and to improve the relation among employees. Also, it can effect the policies of the company. As in many company dating your co-worker is not allowed. This kind of policies are framed by knowing the personal information of the working team, that most of them are single or married.

On the other side, many of them fells that this information is irrelevant. The reason for this can be many people nowadays are introvert they are not willing to share their personal details and their interest. They are feared of peer pressure and being judged by the society and co-workers. For instance, many a time it is seen that if person whether be it male or female. If he/she is not married till a very old age they are being judged by the people around them. It also create insecurity among some of them that what if their interest or hobbies will not align with other working professionals. While some of them thinks that professional life should not be mixed with the personal life, thus they don't share personal details.

In conclusion, I agree with the opinion of gathering personal details like hobbies, field of interest and marital status helps the company and the employees in framing policies, conducting events and involving their employees. Even some people oppose it, thinking this information is not useful, while some are not comfortable, and some of them doesn't want to share it because of professional reasons.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both sides of the argument and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the benefits of team-building events and the privacy concerns of employees. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat uneven. For example, the explanation regarding company policies on dating is a bit simplistic and could have been more thoroughly explored to demonstrate a deeper understanding of the complexities involved. The position is consistent throughout, but the supporting arguments would benefit from more nuanced analysis to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. There is a progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive (e.g., 'On the other hand', 'On the other side'). Additionally, some transitions between sentences are a bit abrupt, which affects the flow. While the paragraphing is appropriate, the internal cohesion within paragraphs could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to connect ideas more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'productivity', 'introvert', and 'peer pressure'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and minor collocation errors, such as 'willing to express to any other person' instead of 'willing to disclose information' and 'they are feared of' instead of 'they fear'. The range is sufficient for the task, but it lacks the precision and sophistication required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'some of does not agree', 'many of them fells', 'some of them doesn't want') and article usage. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentence fragments and comma splices. These errors are noticeable and occur throughout the text, though they do not significantly impede communication. To improve, the student should focus on basic grammatical accuracy and proofreading for subject-verb agreement.

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