Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this concurrent world, It is undoubtedly true that employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some feel positive with this and some disappointed that this sorts of information should be not asked by interviewer at job place. However, I quibble from them and propound that employee's personal information should be known by employer as formalities through kind of interview.

Adequate evidences are obtainable to substantiate the concept of personal information of employee are asked in interview and it may be relevant with their profession or not useful. The top-notch concrete reason is questing related personal information like hobbies, interests, married or single which emphasis on those aspects ,which what is the thoughts, mindset and ambitions of employees, that is direct influence at working place. Another rationale which hauls me to patron is employer posses right and expects to gain all details, knowledge, information about employees, who they are picking for their company which is coherent with companies reputations, image and progressive perspective. For instance, Reliance company first

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 184 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you attempt to address both sides of the argument and state an opinion, the discussion is underdeveloped. The essay ends abruptly mid-sentence ('Reliance company first'), which prevents a full exploration of the topic. To improve, you must ensure you provide a complete, balanced argument with sufficient supporting evidence and a clear conclusion. The current length prevents you from fully developing your points, leading to a partial response to the task requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay shows some attempt at logical organization, with an introduction and body paragraphs. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete nature of the text. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'However' and 'Another rationale', but the overall flow is disrupted by the abrupt ending. Paragraphing is present, but the lack of a concluding paragraph makes the structure feel unfinished. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that the essay concludes with a summary of your main points, ensuring all sentences are complete and logically linked.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an attempt to use a wider range of vocabulary, such as 'concurrent', 'substantiate', and 'patron'. However, some word choices are unnatural or incorrect in context, such as 'I quibble from them' (which is not the standard usage of 'quibble') and 'propound' in this context. There are also issues with collocation, such as 'Adequate evidences are obtainable'. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the basic meaning, the misuse of more complex terms suggests a need for more precise usage. Focus on using words that you are fully confident in to avoid errors that impede clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains several grammatical errors that affect the flow of the writing. Examples include 'this sorts of information should be not asked' (word order), 'employee's personal information should be known by employer' (missing articles), and 'employer posses right' (missing article and spelling). There is a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but the frequency of errors is noticeable. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles. Proofreading for common errors like missing plurals or incorrect verb forms will help improve your accuracy significantly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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