Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this modern period, employment becomes an imperative part in human life. In the job interviews, it becomes common to ask question about personal life therefore, it becomes a contrary opinion among society as some believe it is beneficial while others oppose this. I believe it is beneficial question to ask.

Few people opine that asking questions about personal preferences and marital status are relevant because it helps business to know that whether the person could do the work efficiently or it would be a tough job for him. To explain it more, after getting personal information, employer can know how much time and importance candidate can give to the company without having a family or spouse pressure. For example, most of the trading companies hire unmarried individuals as they can make more efficient decisions.

On the other hand, rest of the community think that this interrogation should be professional only. To explicate it, a job requires the qualification of youngsters which helps the business to work effectively. As the candidates have theoretical knowledge they will be aware about how to behave professionally as well as to tackle the situation by different ways. For instance, 80% of people are hired with the IT skills in past 5 years.

In conclusion, it seems to me that employer should ask the question according to needs of work. If the job is demanding physically then there is no point to have personal information. Contrarily, if the business requires mental strength, then personal life plays an imperative role.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, including both views and a personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding unmarried individuals making 'more efficient decisions' is a broad generalization that lacks sufficient logical support. Similarly, the counter-argument regarding IT skills is not clearly linked to the topic of personal information, making the connection to the prompt weak. To reach a higher band, you should provide more nuanced explanations and concrete examples that directly relate to the specific question of whether personal information is relevant to job performance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'On the other hand' and 'In conclusion,' to signal shifts in the argument. However, the use of linking words is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'To explain it more' or 'To explicate it.' Additionally, the referencing within sentences is occasionally unclear, which makes the flow feel a bit rigid. Improving the variety and naturalness of your transition phrases will help improve the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'marital status,' 'professional,' and 'imperative.' However, there are instances of awkward word choice and collocation, such as 'employment becomes an imperative part' and 'beneficial question.' The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on basic phrasing. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic collocations and avoid repetitive structures. Expanding your range of synonyms and using more sophisticated vocabulary will help you achieve a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the job interviews,' 'the business') and subject-verb agreement ('rest of the community think'). Some sentences are slightly disjointed, such as 'In the job interviews, it becomes common to ask question about personal life therefore, it becomes a contrary opinion.' These errors do not impede communication, but they are noticeable. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensure that your complex sentences are constructed with correct punctuation and conjunctions.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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