Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It has always been debatable whether it is useful to collect personal information of job candidates or it is just an irrelevant and waste of time. Some people believe this information is significantly important while others criticize and think it is inappropriate. I completely disagree with the concept of collecting personal details and interests of applicants.

To commence with, recruiters often collects personal information about their employees such as their interests, hobbies, and martial status. By collecting such information, they can offer them relevant position which matches their interest and they enjoy doing that work. As, it is always noticed that individuals perform better in the job jobs which are related to their area of interest such as, if someone likes to interact with people, he may prefer working in customer services.Similarly, by asking martial status, interviewers can estimates the availability and commitments of the job seekers, because most of married candidates does not prefer to travel for work and also avoids overtime.

On the other hand, hobbies and personal interests does not reflects the actual personality and skill set of an individual. People who are good with technology such as computer hardware or software may have a hobby of reading novels. So, this clearly justify that employers should hire individuals considering their technical knowledge and practical experience rather than focusing on their personal life and area of interests.

From my viewpoint, while hiring an candidate their job experience and qualifications matters much more than their hobbies and interests. For instance, nowadays, individuals choose completely different hobbies to relax and disconnects themselves from their daily life stress.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the first body paragraph attempts to explain why personal information might be useful, the reasoning regarding marital status is a bit stereotypical and lacks nuance. The second body paragraph provides a counter-argument, but it could be more effectively linked to the prompt's requirement to discuss the relevance of hobbies. The conclusion is brief and does not fully synthesize the points made. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully explored with more sophisticated reasoning rather than relying on generalizations.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To commence with', 'Similarly', and 'On the other hand', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'So, this clearly justify that...', where the connection to the previous thought is slightly awkward. Paragraphing is used appropriately, but the internal flow within paragraphs could be improved by varying the sentence structure to better connect ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'debatable' and 'recruiters', but there are also persistent errors in word choice and form, such as 'martial status' (should be 'marital status') and 'irrelevant and waste of time' (should be 'an irrelevant waste of time'). Some collocations are slightly unnatural, such as 'offer them relevant position'. To improve, focus on mastering common collocations and ensuring word forms are used correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that, while not impeding communication, are noticeable. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'recruiters often collects' (should be 'collect'), 'married candidates does not prefer' (should be 'do not prefer'), and 'hobbies... does not reflects' (should be 'do not reflect'). There are also minor punctuation and article errors throughout. While the meaning remains clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Increasing the accuracy of basic grammatical rules is essential.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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