Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It has always been debatable whether it is useful to collect personal information of job applicants or it is just an irrelevant and waste of time. Some people believe this information is significantly important while others criticize and think it is an inappropriate approach to collect such personal data. I completely disagree with the concept of collecting personal details and interests of applicants.

To commence with, recruiters often collect personal information about their employees such as their interests, hobbies, and martial status. By collecting such information, they can offer them relevant positions which matches their interest, so they can enjoy doing that work. As, it is always noticed that individuals perform better on a job positions which are related to their area of interest. For instance, if someone likes to interact with people, he may prefer working in customer services. Similarly, by asking martial status, interviewers can estimates the availability and commitments of the job seekers, because most of married candidates does not prefer to travel for work and also avoid working overtime.

On the other hand, hobbies and personal interests does not reflects the actual personality and skill set of an individual. Individuals who are good with technology such as computer hardware or software might have a hobby of reading novels. So, this clearly justify that employers should hire individuals considering their technical knowledge and practical experience rather than focusing on their personal life and area of interests.

From my viewpoint, while hiring a candidate, their job experience and qualifications matters much more than their hobbies and interests. For instance, nowadays, individuals choose completely different hobbies to relax and disconnects themselves from their daily life stress.

To sum up, employer often wants to collect personal information, so they can designate their employees a related position to get their maximum potential. Whereas, I believe this is an irrelevant approach, employers should focus on their experience and qualifications.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both sides of the argument and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the mention of matching candidates to roles based on interests and the counter-argument regarding technical skills. However, some points are slightly under-developed; for instance, the explanation regarding marital status and travel availability is a bit simplistic. The position is consistent throughout the essay, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points. To reach a higher band, ensure that arguments are supported with more nuanced reasoning rather than relying on generalized assumptions.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with clear paragraphing. Each paragraph has a central topic, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. Cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Similarly', 'On the other hand', and 'To sum up' are used to link ideas effectively. However, there are instances where the flow could be smoother, and some transitions feel slightly mechanical. The use of referencing is generally clear, though occasional minor lapses in cohesion occur, such as the slightly abrupt transition between the second and third paragraphs. Overall, the structure is coherent and supports the development of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'designate' and 'irrelevant approach'. However, there are several errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'martial status' (should be 'marital status') and 'does not reflects' (should be 'do not reflect'). These errors do not impede communication but indicate a need for more precise control over word forms and subject-verb agreement in a lexical context. Expanding the range of topic-specific vocabulary would further improve the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the writer attempts complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'hobbies and personal interests does not reflects', 'most of married candidates does not prefer'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor errors, such as the unnecessary comma in 'As, it is always noticed'. Despite these errors, the meaning remains clear throughout the text. To improve, the writer should focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, especially regarding pluralization and verb agreement.

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