Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In many job interviews employers sometimes ask people for personal details, such as their marital status and hobbies. While some believe that this information help employers understand their candidate better whereas others believe providing details is completely unnecessary for job performance. In my opinion, job selection must be made on skills and qualification not on personal information.

On the one hand, providing with personal information such as hobbies and interests can help employers hired at an ease and helps to build a better workplace. Knowing about applicant's idea as well as interests can give idea about their candidate's personality, team-work skills and habits. For instance, someone who plays well in sports in their free time might collaborate well with their colleagues. Additionally, understanding in regards of their marital status can help employers whether a candidate can work overtime and can travel to international trip with their business work without any conflicts.

On the other hand, many people argue that having personal information can sometimes misguide people which can lead to unfair treatment. Applicant's past work history, qualification and skills are to be determined when hiring them not about their personal life. Furthermore, asking about candidate's marital status is considered as irrelevant question that can be skipped when hiring them. For example, employers might not hire a person if he is marries as he cannot contribute more hours at work which can hinder productivity.

To conclude, although learning about employees personal details or background might offer a small glimpse into their lifestyle, I firmly believe that all the information about private life is considered as confidential on professional level and employers should strictly focus on skills as well as qualifications of their employees.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both sides of the argument and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the mention of team-work skills and the potential for unfair treatment. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the point about marital status and international travel is a bit superficial. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your arguments with more detailed explanations or nuanced examples. The position is consistent throughout, but the overall depth of the analysis could be improved to better satisfy the requirements for a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the two viewpoints. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Furthermore', which help the flow of the essay. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or repetitive. Additionally, there are minor issues with referencing and flow, such as the awkward phrasing in the introduction: 'While some believe... whereas others believe'. Improving the variety of your linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'confidential', 'productivity', and 'professional level'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'providing with personal information', 'hired at an ease', and 'international trip with their business work'. These errors do not impede communication, but they do highlight a lack of flexibility and precision. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and using more sophisticated vocabulary in a natural way, rather than relying on slightly awkward phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'this information help' (subject-verb agreement), 'if he is marries' (incorrect verb form), and 'asking about candidate's marital status is considered as irrelevant question' (missing article). These errors are noticeable but do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning. To achieve a higher band, you need to increase the frequency of error-free sentences and pay closer attention to basic grammar rules like subject-verb agreement and article usage.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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