Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is observed that companies request to know the personal stuff of their employees which is asking for their passion and interests, even relationship status of a worker while hiring. However, some people believe that this piece of information can be useful to the company while others disagree. In my perspective, it is crucial to know these little details of an employee as it might help in understanding the candidate more precisely.

Hobbies and interest may enhance the performance of an employee when it comes to presenting themselves at work. For instance, if a company hires a person with a title of Digital marketing expert. Therefore, if a worker has a hobby of editing and writing blogs, it might directly affect the company because the employee enjoys the work assigned which is directly proportional to the quality and precision of work done by the employee.

Personal preference of telling the relationship status can benefit both the employee and the employer when expecting an international business trip or a conference outside the city. For example, it is believed that folks with no family responsibility are more work orientated than people being married. Hence, it provides a sense of reliability of employer on the worker in order to get the work done without compromising the family or other responsibilities.

On the other hand, companies should hire the candidates irrespective of their of their relationship status or hobbies being involved. For example, it is pivotal to let the employee know their duties and responsibilities towards work. Typically, the employee have to perform well without considering their will or family responsibilities.

To recapitulate, it is pivotal to consider both the sides, although knowing the habits and status of employee their performance depends on the willpower and interest they has to offer. However, it should be considered with utmost importance but companies must respect the decision of the employer if they are not comfortable sharing it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both sides of the issue and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the link between hobbies and job performance, and the discussion of travel flexibility. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The argument regarding relationship status is a bit stereotypical and could be more nuanced. The conclusion is slightly contradictory, as it suggests companies should respect privacy while also implying that knowing these details is 'pivotal'. To reach a higher band, ensure that arguments are fully extended and that the personal position remains consistent throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'However', 'For instance', and 'On the other hand', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is slightly disrupted by awkward phrasing, such as the transition between the second and third paragraphs. The use of referencing is generally clear, though some sentences are slightly disjointed. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between ideas would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific language like 'digital marketing expert' and 'international business trip'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of imprecise word choice, such as 'personal stuff' (too informal) and 'folks' (too colloquial). Some collocations are also slightly unnatural, such as 'reliability of employer on the worker'. To improve, the student should focus on using more academic and precise vocabulary and avoiding informal register.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('the employee have to perform', 'interest they has to offer') and awkward phrasing ('irrespective of their of their relationship status'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some minor errors. To reach a higher band, the student needs to demonstrate better control over complex structures and ensure that basic grammatical rules, particularly subject-verb agreement, are applied consistently.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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