Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In recent years, it has been discovered that several individuals believe that the interviewers should always ask applicants private questions such as their marital status, likes and dislikes and hobbies while other say that people looking for should not be asked personal questions. In my opinion, requiring personal is essential for the organization to be know more about their intending employee. In the following paragraph, I will discuss both views and explain my perspectives.
The primary aim of an employer eager to know a few things about their applicant is that is to enable them to be more familiar and most importantly to know if they can fit into the available opening. A good employer should be able to say some few things about their employees personal life.
Despite the familiarity, there are some arguments that this information should not be asked that is not relevant since it not contribute to their productivity and effectiveness at work. Most people believe that their private life should be kept away from their employer because they know that it is no more confidential once the interviewer is aware of their personal life.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 189 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you address both views and state a position, the arguments are underdeveloped and lack specific examples or depth. The discussion is quite brief, and the conclusion is entirely missing, which prevents a full exploration of the topic. To improve, you must expand on your points with detailed explanations and concrete examples, ensuring you meet the length requirement to allow for a more comprehensive response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is limited due to the brevity of the text. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In the following paragraph' and 'Despite the familiarity', but they are somewhat mechanical. The logical flow is hindered by the lack of a clear conclusion and the underdeveloped nature of the body paragraphs. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details that logically lead to the next point.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You use some repetitive phrasing, such as 'personal information' and 'personal life'. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'intending employee' instead of 'prospective employee'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more sophisticated vocabulary and collocations related to the workplace and professional conduct, while avoiding repetitive or overly simple word choices.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity, such as 'while other say that people looking for should not be asked' and 'requiring personal is essential'. There are also issues with article usage and sentence construction. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and ensure that your sentences are complete and grammatically sound. Practicing the use of complex structures like relative clauses or conditional sentences will also help improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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