Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
In today's fast-paced world, many individuals hold diverse opinion on a wide range of topics. Some people believe that providing personal information such as hobbies, interests and married life while applying for a job is as crucial as asked by owner whereas other opine that individual should not reveal private information. In my opinion, it is important to analyse both sides of argument before forming a well-definite opinion.
To begin with, supporters of providing personal information argue that it helps employers understanding a candidate's character and suitability for role. For instance, knowing a person's hobby may indicate certain skills, such as teamwork, creativity or leaderships. Similarly, some employers believe that marital states may help them asses an applicant's stability or long-term commitment. For roles that involves teamwork, public interaction, understanding someone's personality and interests may assist in building a more cohesive working environment.
On the other hand, many people believe that personal details have little or no relevance to professional ability. An applicant's hobbies or marital status does not determine their competence, qualifications, work etc. In such cases asking for personal information can even lead to discrimination. For example, single parents or unmarried individual might be unfairly judged as less reliable. Moreover, modern workplaces increasingly value privacy and unnecessary personal questions can make applicants uncomfortable.
In conclusion, although some opine that personal information can help employers assess applicants more fully. In my opinion, potential for discrimination outweighs any minor benefits. Employers should therefore respect privacy and focus solely on job related qualities.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both sides of the issue and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant and logically extended, such as the discussion on potential discrimination versus the argument for assessing character. However, the development is somewhat brief, and the conclusion is a sentence fragment ('Although some opine...'). To reach a higher band, the arguments could be supported with more detailed, specific examples rather than general statements. The position is consistent throughout, and the response successfully navigates the requirements of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate the two viewpoints. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'On the other hand', and 'Moreover' are used to guide the reader through the argument. However, there are some minor issues with cohesion, such as the sentence fragment in the conclusion, which disrupts the flow. The referencing is generally clear, and the progression of ideas is logical, though the transition between sentences could be smoother in some places to achieve a more natural flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally appropriate for the task, with some attempts at less common items like 'cohesive working environment' and 'professional ability'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'asked by owner' (should be 'employer') and 'marital states' (should be 'marital status'). Additionally, 'well-definite' is not a standard collocation. While the range is sufficient to convey meaning clearly, the vocabulary lacks the precision and sophistication required for a higher band. The errors do not impede communication, but they do highlight a need for more accurate word usage.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'many individuals hold diverse opinion' (should be 'opinions'), 'helps employers understanding' (should be 'helps employers understand'), and 'roles that involves' (should be 'roles that involve'). Punctuation is generally adequate, but the sentence fragment in the conclusion is a notable error. While the meaning is always clear, the frequency of these small grammatical slips prevents the response from reaching a higher band. A greater focus on subject-verb agreement and pluralization would improve the accuracy significantly.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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