Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is widely suggested that providing the personal details should be relevant, because these are not an essential aspect in a professional resume. However, I believe that it is crucial for employers to know about the personality of a person, which they are going to work with.
On one hand, person who ignore this section or fill it with irrelevant details, might face serious consequences after joining the team. A prime example would be if a person's cv said he or she is single, later he or she is not eligible for insurance benefit or other medical facilities for their spouse.
It is, therefore clear, providing false information might effect a lot in professional setting.
On other hand, employees who provide real information related to their personality or personal status, would be more loyal to the company in the long run. Not only this approach showcase the loyalty towards the organization and co-workers , but also helps to build more trustworthy relation with the boss. Because of this nature the employer can hand over the crucial projects , which may results in ecomicalgrowth, because of the loyalty.
From my standpoint, including a true image about the personal traits, makes the resume different from other applicants. As the team leader learn more about the applicant's nature,
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you address both sides of the argument and provide a personal opinion, the conclusion is incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence. The arguments regarding insurance benefits and loyalty are relevant but remain under-developed due to the lack of length. To improve, you must ensure all parts of the prompt are fully explored and that your essay reaches the required length to allow for a comprehensive discussion and a finished conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt at logical progression. You use some cohesive devices like 'On one hand' and 'On other hand', but the flow is occasionally mechanical. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the link between marital status and insurance benefits is not fully explained. The abrupt ending of the essay negatively impacts the overall coherence, as the final paragraph is left unfinished. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring a complete, well-structured conclusion will help improve this score.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You use some relevant terms like 'professional setting' and 'personal traits', but there are errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'ecomicalgrowth' (economic growth) and 'effect a lot' (which should be 'affect'). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on simple phrasing. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations and ensure accurate usage of academic vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
There is a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. You have frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, such as 'providing the personal details should be relevant' (which is slightly awkward) and 'As the team leader learn more' (should be 'learns'). There are also issues with article usage and subject-verb agreement. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to lower the score. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical errors and ensuring subject-verb agreement will be beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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