Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In this cutting-edge era the majority of people crack their job interviews. They believe that when employers ask questions regarding their personal information like married status or hobbies, it's not necessary or relevant. However, I believe that it's the best to know more about the person's background.
To commence with, there are various reasons why people don't want to disclose their personal information. First and foremost reason is that, hiring should be based on experience and skill as compared to personal information.Sometimes personal information leads to discrimination among other candidates. Therefore, they believe that skill, experience and qualifications matters more because knowledge matters more than personal information.
However, I believe that asking personal information helps employers to understand their employees better than their education. Sometimes they attached fake documents regarding experience and qualifications. As with the help of hobbies they can show their skills like team work and critical thinking. And these questions also help them to show their communication skills . Otherwise sometimes they got similar answers from online sites and they copy them. Which will be heard for interviewer to judge the best candidate for their company. As a result, personal information also helps them to stay comfortable during their interviews.
For example, if they have personal information regarding their personal life like marriage, hobbies helps interviewers to understand if they have keen interest in community works. Then they have strong communication skills and team work: Which will help company to get better employees.
To conclude, although skill based question and qualification based questions during interviews helps the employer to get better educated person. But I think if they understand employees better with their personal information then they can feel more comfortable working with the company.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat inconsistent. While you mention that personal information can lead to discrimination, the explanation is brief. Similarly, the argument that hobbies reveal 'team work' is a relevant point, but the connection between marital status and 'community work' is not clearly explained or logically sound. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully explored with clear, logical reasoning rather than relying on general assertions. The conclusion effectively summarizes your position, but the overall depth of the arguments remains limited.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'However', and 'As a result'. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as starting a sentence with 'Which will be heard for interviewer'. Additionally, the use of referencing is sometimes unclear; for example, the pronoun 'they' is used frequently, but it is not always immediately obvious whether you are referring to employers, candidates, or the information itself. Improving the variety and precision of your linking words will help the flow of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'discrimination', 'qualifications', and 'communication skills'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'crack their job interviews' (which is informal/idiomatic in a way that doesn't fit the context), 'heard for interviewer' (likely meaning 'hard for the interviewer'), and 'attached fake documents' (where 'submitted' or 'provided' would be more appropriate). To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring that words are used in their correct collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'qualifications matters') and sentence fragments (e.g., 'Which will be heard for interviewer...'). There are also issues with article usage and punctuation, such as the missing space after commas. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your main points, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency of the text. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and sentence completion will significantly improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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