Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The relevancy of asking personal information like marital status and hobbies of prospective employees is often questioned by many. An applicant's hobbies and interests would be useful in predicting the personality or skills that they may have acquired, whereas the marital status is private information and disclosing it serves no benefit.

When hiring, employers want to hire individuals that are like jacks of all trades. Who not only have good academic credentials but also soft skills. To gauge how much of a team player the potential candidate is or how well he/she performs under pressure, the employer often seems to benefit from asking about interests and hobbies. For example, someone who actively plays sports is often exposed to stressful situations and works in a team towards a common goal.

On the other hand, information on personal life could be rather detrimental for both employers and the potential employees. To explain this, let's take an example of bias that is often reported by women. Employers often scrutinise hiring married women based on presumptions that she might not be able to focus and prioritise work, often ignoring her professional and academic history. This may lead to employers not hiring someone who was actually well capable only because their judgement was clouded.

In conclusion, employers should ask questions from applicants outside of academic and professional history to understand the candidate better. A candidate should only be asked for information that helps understanding how well he/she may suit the particular role. The likes and interests do give a picture of the personality nonetheless, asking about marital status is not only intrusive but also very misleading and shouldn't be factored in.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both the utility of personal information and the potential drawbacks. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout the essay. The ideas are well-developed, particularly the example regarding gender bias in hiring, which adds depth to your argument. To reach a higher band, ensure that your conclusion fully synthesizes your main points rather than introducing a slightly nuanced distinction about 'likes and interests' that was not fully explored in the body paragraphs. Overall, the response is well-focused and relevant.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and you use cohesive devices such as 'On the other hand' and 'For example' effectively to guide the reader. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different viewpoints. While the flow is generally smooth, some transitions between sentences could be more sophisticated to avoid a slightly mechanical feel. For instance, the link between the second and third paragraphs could be strengthened to create a more seamless transition between the benefits and the drawbacks of the topic.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with precision. Phrases like 'detrimental', 'scrutinise', and 'clouded judgement' are used effectively. However, there are some minor issues with word choice and collocation. For example, 'asking questions from applicants' is slightly unnatural; 'asking applicants questions' or 'inquiring about' would be more standard. Additionally, 'jacks of all trades' is a bit informal for an academic essay. Expanding your range to include more academic collocations would help elevate your score further.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, and your meaning is consistently clear. There are some minor grammatical slips, such as 'someone who was actually well capable' (should be 'well-qualified' or 'highly capable') and 'asking about marital status is not only intrusive but also very misleading and shouldn't be factored in' (the structure is clear, but could be more formal). Punctuation is generally accurate, though some sentences could be refined for better flow. The majority of your sentences are error-free, which supports a solid band 7.0.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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