Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is true that, sometimes the bosses put some questions from the person during the job I interview related to their hobbies, interests and about their marital status as well as some people think that it it relevant information and few person think that it is not useful. However, there are both views of this trend with my own opinion and the ideas will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.
To commence with, there are some people think it is irrelevant and unusual information. The first and the foremost idea is that, a lot of people think that their personal information related to their family as well as their interest do not share with others for their family safety and as for their rules and regulations. Apart from this, some people adapt different nature and feels not good to share these information with others.
Nevertheless, there are few people to think that is it useful for employers. Firstly, as head of the department they want to know about their employee before hiring that person and they can want to check their dedication, ambition for their job it also in business, the employers have a lot of responsibilities related to their career, company and their work so, it is crucial question for employees from employers while the interview, because that question explain the person and their quality.
In conclusion, although there are both views of this statement and my own opinion is that, it is essential information during the interview, due to aforementioned paragraphs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, satisfying the basic requirements of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is limited. For instance, the argument regarding why personal information is irrelevant is vague, relying on general statements about 'safety' and 'rules' without specific explanation. Similarly, the argument for why employers need this information is underdeveloped; the mention of 'dedication' and 'ambition' is a good start, but it lacks concrete examples or logical expansion. The position is stated but not consistently supported throughout the body paragraphs, leading to a somewhat superficial treatment of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'To commence with' and 'The first and the foremost idea' are used in a formulaic way. Additionally, there are issues with referencing; for example, the phrase 'there are both views of this trend' is awkward and does not effectively link to the preceding sentence. The flow between sentences is occasionally disjointed, making the progression of ideas feel somewhat repetitive rather than building toward a strong conclusion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary range is limited and often repetitive. The student relies on basic terms such as 'good', 'useful', and 'people'. There are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'put some questions from the person' instead of 'ask the candidate questions' and 'adapt different nature' instead of 'have different personalities'. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of precision and the reliance on simple vocabulary prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. More sophisticated vocabulary related to the professional context would significantly improve the quality of the writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('some people think... and few person think'), incorrect article usage, and awkward phrasing ('it it relevant information'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma placement. While the student attempts complex sentences, they are often marred by errors in word order or tense usage, such as 'they can want to check their dedication'. These errors are frequent enough to be noticeable throughout the text.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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