Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Some people believe that employers asking potential employees about their personal lives is unnecessary, while other disagree with this. This essay will discuss both views.

Employers asking about potential employee's personal lives may make them feel uncomfortable and may appear unprofessional.

Potential employees are only concerned with how their work skills can benefit the organization. Several aspects of their personal lives do not seem important as regards the job. Hence, they do not feel comfortable when employers inquire about those things. There are people who prefer not to talk about certain aspects of their lives due to trauma. Employers questioning them about it may seem insensitive. Furthermore, employers leaving the main focus of the interview and questioning candidates about their personal lives, may appear to be unprofessional. Candidates believe the main focus for any interview is the services they can render the company and not their marital status. Employers asking about such questions may be labeled unprofessional and it will be frowned upon. For instance, an employer inquiring about a potential employee's personal interest appears to be absurd.

On the other hand, inquiring about a candidate's personal life, allows the employer to know how their personal life will impact on the job. An individual with several personal commitments outside work, may lose focus and jeopardize the company's system. It is often difficult to balance work and a chaotic personal life. For instance, a married woman with four kids, may find it difficult to balance her personal life and her work life. Also, employers asking about candidates' personal life, gives the interview room an air of comfort. It makes the potential employee more comfortable and allows for both the employer and the candidate to bond effectively. A proper work bond between employer and employee allows for a healthy work environment.

In conclusion, employers asking about a candidate's personal life appears to be unprofessional, but I believe it allows for a better bond and created a healthy work environment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The argument regarding the 'comfort' of personal questions is a bit weak and relies on a stereotypical example (a married woman with children), which borders on over-generalisation. While the task is fully addressed, the supporting arguments could be more nuanced and professional to reach a higher band. The position is consistent, but the reasoning in the second body paragraph lacks the depth required for a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organised with clear paragraphing. Each paragraph has a central theme. Cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'On the other hand', and 'For instance' are used to link ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. The concluding sentence is a bit abrupt and does not fully synthesise the preceding arguments, but the overall progression of ideas remains clear throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task. You use some relevant terms like 'jeopardize', 'insensitive', and 'unprofessional'. However, there is a lack of variety in your word choices, and some phrases are repetitive (e.g., 'personal lives' and 'personal life' are used frequently). To improve, try to incorporate more precise synonyms and collocations related to the professional context of the prompt. The range is sufficient to convey meaning clearly, but it does not demonstrate the flexibility or sophistication required for a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical errors, such as 'other disagree' (should be 'others'), 'employee's personal lives' (should be 'employees''), and 'created a healthy work environment' (should be 'creates'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Your control over punctuation is generally good, but ensure you are consistent with subject-verb agreement and pluralisation throughout your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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