Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There are currently contentious arguments over whether providing personal information to companies' records is sufficient. I totally agree with this opinion because of a judgment of mindset and information about the skills and abilities a person has.

The first and foremost reason why I agree is the way of thinking pattern of candidates. This is because sometimes workers face pressure throughout the hectic office hours. For example, many times companies suspect faults in project work at the deadline, where people panic and never come up with a suitable solution. Therefore, workers make wrong decisions, and companies suffer not only financial crises but also a fall in reputation and productivity.

Another crucial reason is that a clear glance of capability person can demonstrate the future. In other words, when bosses know the abilities and interests of employees, it is easy for them to allot the right work to the suitable person. For instance, in multinational companies, projects fail due to giving important work to an incapable person who never comes up with convenient documents and solutions. As a result, because of the boss's wrong decision-making, many talented people never get the right position in the company, and the company faces consequences for the whole year.

Having analyzed the various aspects of the issue in question, it is concluded the info

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you attempt to address both sides of the argument, the discussion is underdeveloped and the conclusion is incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence. You state your position clearly in the introduction, but the supporting arguments regarding 'mindset' and 'capability' lack depth and specific, relevant examples. To improve, ensure you fully explore each viewpoint and provide a complete, well-structured conclusion. The under-length nature of the essay prevents a full development of the task requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay shows a basic attempt at logical organization with clear paragraph breaks. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete nature of the text. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'The first and foremost reason' and 'Another crucial reason', which help guide the reader. However, the lack of a proper conclusion and the abrupt ending disrupt the overall flow. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that your ideas are linked more fluidly, leading to a finished, cohesive final paragraph.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'contentious arguments', 'reputation', and 'productivity'. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and imprecise word choices, such as 'clear glance of capability person' and 'convenient documents', which make some sentences difficult to interpret. The vocabulary is generally functional but lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. Focus on learning collocations—words that naturally go together—to improve the naturalness of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'providing personal information to companies' records is sufficient' and 'a clear glance of capability person can demonstrate the future'. These errors, along with issues in sentence construction, occasionally impede the flow of the text. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles and prepositions. Proofreading for basic sentence structure errors will help increase your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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