Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 7.5)

Whether employers should ask job applicants to disclose personal information, such as their hobbies, interests, or marital status, is a contentious issue. While some argue that such details can help employers assess candidates more comprehensively, I believe that recruitment should primarily be based on professional merit and job-related competencies.

On the one hand, obtaining personal information can provide employers with additional insights into an applicant’s personality and suitability for a particular workplace. For example, participation in team sports may demonstrate an ability to cooperate effectively, whereas creative hobbies such as writing or painting could suggest originality and imagination. Moreover, knowing an employee’s family circumstances may enable companies to offer appropriate benefits or determine whether relocation would be feasible. From this perspective, personal information can contribute to a better understanding of whether an applicant would integrate successfully into the organisation.

On the other hand, there are compelling reasons to restrict such questions, particularly because they can compromise privacy and facilitate discrimination. Marital status, for instance, has little bearing on an individual’s qualifications, productivity, or professional conduct. Asking women whether they are married or intend to have children may also lead employers to make unfair assumptions about future maternity leave. Similarly, judging candidates according to their hobbies could create unconscious preferences for people from similar social or cultural backgrounds. Consequently, recruitment decisions may become subjective rather than being determined by genuine ability.

In my view, employers should avoid requesting personal information unless it has a clear and direct relevance to the position. Although hobbies may occasionally reveal useful characteristics, qualifications, experience, and demonstrable skills provide far more reliable indicators of workplace performance. A fair recruitment process should therefore prioritise objective criteria, ensuring that candidates are evaluated on their capabilities rather than their private lives.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response fully addresses all parts of the prompt. You have clearly discussed both sides of the argument—the potential benefits of personal information in recruitment and the risks of privacy intrusion and discrimination—while maintaining a consistent personal position throughout. Your ideas are well-developed, with specific examples such as team sports indicating cooperation and the potential for gender-based discrimination regarding maternity leave. The conclusion effectively synthesizes your argument, reinforcing the need for objective recruitment criteria. The response is balanced, logical, and directly answers the task requirements with a clear focus on the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the two viewpoints is smooth, facilitated by effective cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'Moreover,' and 'Consequently.' The paragraphing is logical and contributes to the overall clarity of the argument. Referencing is precise, and the flow of information is natural, making the essay easy to follow. There is no evidence of mechanical or repetitive use of linking words, and the structure supports the development of your argument effectively.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.5

You demonstrate a wide and flexible range of vocabulary that is well-suited to the task. You use sophisticated collocations and topic-specific terminology such as 'contentious issue,' 'professional merit,' 'job-related competencies,' and 'unconscious preferences.' The language is precise and natural throughout the essay. There are no noticeable errors in word choice or spelling, and your ability to use less common items, like 'demonstrable skills' and 'facilitate discrimination,' shows a high level of lexical control. The vocabulary is consistently appropriate for an academic or formal context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5

The essay displays a wide range of grammatical structures with high accuracy. You effectively use complex sentence forms, such as conditional structures ('unless it has a clear and direct relevance') and subordinate clauses ('Although hobbies may occasionally reveal...'). The majority of your sentences are error-free, and your control over punctuation and syntax is excellent. There are no significant grammatical slips that impede communication. The variety of sentence types used—ranging from simple to complex—is well-managed and contributes to the overall fluency and professional tone of the writing.

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