Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-23
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In many job applications, employers ask applicants about personal details about their hobbies,intrests,and their marital status. Some people believe that this information can help employers to make better decisions , while other people think it is unneccessary and unfair.In my opinion,hobbies and interests may be useful in some cases,but asking about marital status is not neccessary.I will both views and discuss my opinion in the following paragraphs.
examining the former view , the primary argument the supporters would put forward is that the personal information can give employers a better understanding about the candidate. For instance,if a company is hiring for a sports club so, they need interactive and fit person for doing job in sports club.In real life, I have seen that people who are good in volunteering they work responsibily because they do teamwork.
On the contrary, the proponents of the latter view have their own claims.The foremost argument they put forth is that the some personal questions are not neccessary for job performance. For examle, a person can be married or single and both can have same ability to do any kind of job. So, employer should judge them by their work experience and on-time behaviour.
In conclusion, employers should focus on candidate's job related information. But however, asking about hobbies can be significant if it is connected to the job.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views—that personal details are useful or that they are unnecessary—and provides a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive, particularly in the body paragraphs where examples like the sports club or volunteering are underdeveloped. Furthermore, the response suffers a significant penalty under Task Achievement because it fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 250 words, coming in at only 224 words. Consequently, the ideas cannot be fully extended as required for higher band levels, placing this response firmly in the band 5 range.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The text demonstrates a basic overall progression with clear paragraphing, separating the introduction, two body paragraphs, and the conclusion. Cohesive devices are used to signal shifts in argumentation, such as 'On the contrary' and 'In conclusion'. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical, as seen in awkward transitional phrasing like 'examining the former view , the primary argument' and the repetitive sentence structures linking ideas. Paragraphing is adequate, but the logical flow between sentences is occasionally disrupted by punctuation errors and imprecise linking words, leading to a band 6 score for cohesion and coherence.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'marital status', 'job performance', 'work experience', and 'unnecessary'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text, including 'intrests' instead of 'interests', 'unneccessary' instead of 'unnecessary', and awkward phrasing like 'interactive and fit person for doing job'. These lexical errors and the reliance on repetitive vocabulary ('personal information', 'job') restrict the lexical score to band 5.0, as the vocabulary is minimally adequate but demonstrates noticeable inaccuracies.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional and relative clauses. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent punctuation and spacing errors (e.g., missing spaces after commas, as in 'hobbies,intrests,and'), missing articles (e.g., 'doing job in sports club', 'employer should judge them'), and awkward phrasing like 'I will both views and discuss my opinion'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur with high frequency and prevent the text from achieving a higher score. The control of grammar is consistent with a band 5 performance.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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