Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nowadays, many employers ask applicants to provide their personal details. Some people believe that such information is essential and useful, while others disagree. I agree with the latter view and will discuss both these views with relevant examples in the subsequent paragraphs.

The main reason why personal information is not essential for a job application is that it does not necessarily reflect an applicant's ability to perform the job. For instance, a person's marital status and hobbies have little connection with professional skills and qualifications. Moreover, some people may feel uncomfortable disclosing their personal information in a professional setting. Some applicants may choose not to apply for positions where personal details are compulsory. As a result, employers may sometimes miss the opportunity to hire highly skilled workers. Therefore, employers should make the personal information section optional, allowing applicants to decide whether they are comfortable providing such details.

On the other hand, personal details can play a vital role while submitting a job application and the main reason is that they may help employers to select a suitable candidate by considering their interests and hobbies. For example, if a position requires employees to work onsite for most of their working period, the employer chooses the applicant who prefers this type of working arrangement. It can also contribute positively to an employee's overall productivity and is beneficial to employers for profit. However, by knowing the marital status of applicants, employers will get an idea about the health coverage expense needed for their family. Therefore, some employers may consider such personal details useful in certain circumstances, although applicants should be comfortable with providing them.

To conclude, disclosing personal details to employers during the application process should not be compulsory, as this may discourage some qualified applicants from applying, meaning that employers could miss the opportunity to hire highly skilled workers. Therefore, personal information should be optional rather than compulsory.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The student addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views—that personal information is useful and that it is unnecessary or intrusive—while clearly stating their own opinion in the introduction and conclusion. The position is maintained throughout the essay. Ideas are extended and supported, such as explaining how mandatory personal details might deter qualified applicants or how knowing marital status could help calculate health coverage expenses. However, some arguments tend to over-generalise or remain slightly under-developed, particularly regarding how hobbies relate to on-site work arrangements. Overall, the response meets the requirements for Band 7, as all parts of the prompt are addressed with a clear position and well-reasoned support.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay displays a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct central topic, moving smoothly from the introduction to the arguments against mandatory personal details, the counter-arguments supporting them, and finally the conclusion. Cohesive devices are used effectively to connect ideas, such as 'The main reason why', 'Moreover', and 'On the other hand'. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately to group related ideas. While cohesion is sometimes a bit formulaic, referencing and overall progression remain clear and easy to follow, aligning well with the Band 7 descriptors.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

The student demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary for the task, allowing for some flexibility and precision with phrases like 'professional skills and qualifications', 'compulsory', 'working arrangement', and 'overall productivity'. There are occasional attempts to use less common items, and meaning is communicated clearly throughout. While there are a few minor lexical choices that could be more polished—such as 'expense needed for their family' rather than expenses or costs—the vocabulary is adequate to allow the reader to follow the arguments easily without any strain. This performance fits comfortably into Band 6.5 to 7.0, supported by sufficient control of language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The essay features a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures, incorporating subordinate clauses effectively (e.g., 'As a result, employers may sometimes miss the opportunity to hire highly skilled workers' and 'if a position requires employees to work onsite for most of their working period'). There is good control of grammar and punctuation, with frequent error-free sentences. Minor slips occur occasionally, such as 'while submitting a job application' where 'when submitting' might sound more natural, but these errors do not impede communication. The grammatical control demonstrated throughout the response is consistent with a solid Band 7 rating.

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