Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Applying for a job these days is a bit hectic. The recruitment process is also a little complex. So, for a smooth recruitment process most of the companies requires the people to fill out a detailed application form for applying to the job.

Most of the job applications include personal information such as hobbies, personal interests or information about the marriage life. Some people think that this kind of information is irrelevant becuase it plays no role in acquiring the job. On the contrary, some people think that perosnal information should be included in the job application because it helps the recruiters to deeply understand the person who is applying to the job. This type of information also helps the recruiters in assesing that wether the person should be hired or not for this speicfic job.

But in my opinion, the application form should not ask about personal details. The application should only include the information about mandatory qualifications and experinece which is required for the job. In my opinion another problem that people face while filling out long appliaction forms is the time. As filling out such forms need enormous time and also causes mental stress. Most of the people applying for the jobs are already stressed for getting a job and filling such forms makes them more stressed. One of my friend was searching for a job since a long time. He was targteing to apply for around 10 - 12 jobs a day, but when he started filling the job applications, it became a little exhausting for him to fill out unnecassary information for every job post. A single application form took around 2 or 3 hours. In this way he could not achieve his target and could fill out 4 to 5 forms and in this way he became more stressed every passing day.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You present a clear opinion that application forms should focus on qualifications and experience, and you explain this view with a relevant example about your friend’s difficulty completing multiple forms. You also introduce both sides: personal details may be seen as irrelevant, while recruiters may use them to understand applicants. However, the opposing view is only briefly described, and the claim that such details help recruiters decide whether someone should be hired is not explained with a specific reason or example. The discussion therefore addresses the task, but the two perspectives are not developed equally. To strengthen the response, explain when hobbies or interests might be relevant to a role, and clarify why marital status should or should not influence recruitment.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a generally clear sequence: an introduction, a paragraph presenting the two views, and a final paragraph explaining your position and example. Linking phrases such as “On the contrary” and “But in my opinion” help signal shifts in argument. The main weakness is that the final paragraph combines your central argument about privacy and job-related criteria with a lengthy example about application time, so the relationship between these points is not always clear. Some ideas also repeat, particularly the claim that forms contain unnecessary information and cause stress. Use separate paragraphs for your opinion and supporting example, and make the connection between each example and the question explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate your main points, including “recruitment process,” “personal interests,” “mandatory qualifications,” and “mental stress.” However, the range is limited by repeated general words such as “information,” “job,” and “form,” and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, including “marriage life,” “acquiring the job,” and “targeting to apply.” Spelling errors such as “becuase,” “perosnal,” and “unnecassary” are noticeable and reduce the overall control of vocabulary. Aim for more precise terms connected to hiring and privacy, and proofread carefully. This would make your argument clearer and more natural without changing its meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and most of the meaning remains understandable. There are, however, recurring errors in agreement and sentence construction. For example, “most of the companies requires” should use a plural verb, while “As filling out such forms need enormous time” is an incomplete dependent clause and has an incorrect verb pattern. The sentence beginning “In my opinion another problem…” also needs clearer punctuation and structure. Some sentences are long and joined with “and,” which makes the relationships between ideas harder to follow. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and complete clause structures, and divide long sentences where necessary. More consistent control would make your varied sentence attempts easier to read.

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