Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Many employers are asking job applicants about their personal information, such as interests, hobbies and marital status. some individuals believe that this information is useful and relevant, while others say that this is irrelevant to hire new staff. Although I believe pesonal information helps employer understand people personality and ability, this also contributes into discrimination at the workplace.

On the one hand, slecting people by knowing their personal information may help employer know people's personalities and identify their skills. Many people are good in problem-solving skills because they enjoy reading, whereas others are prefect in working teams. As a result, employers can easily understand where an applicant can be fit for different roles. For example, in Canada, comapnies always hire creative people so that they can deal with any type problems while working.

On the other hands, this may increase discrimination among workers. If a person is married, he always demads to work more hours and overtime because he wants to be able to afford for childern's education, rents, bills, and medicine, although single person is judged according to his needs, and not given these extra benefits and overtime. For example, in India, married employees usually demand to have an increase in their salary due to family's expenses. Sometimes, this may be the reason of conflict at the workplace.

In conclusion, although persona information tells more about people's lives and behaviour to increase work's productivity, this may also discriminate with those who have less responsibilities. Therefore, I believe that applicants should be hired by their experience and knowledge so that everyone is considered equally.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and give a clear final position: personal details may help employers understand applicants, but hiring should ultimately be based on experience and knowledge to ensure fairness. The two body paragraphs are relevant, and the examples from Canada and India help illustrate your points. However, some reasoning is not fully clear or developed. For instance, the link between hobbies such as reading and problem-solving ability is asserted rather than explained, and the claim that married employees demand more overtime does not directly show why employers should collect marital information. Develop each view with a more precise explanation of how the information could help—or unfairly influence—a hiring decision, and make sure examples directly support that reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion that restates your opinion. The signposts “On the one hand,” “On the other hands,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow, and ideas within each paragraph generally relate to its main point. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some stronger control through paragraphing and a consistent line of argument. However, connections between claims are occasionally unclear, particularly in the discussion of marital status, overtime, and benefits. Some linking phrases also feel mechanical or imprecise. Use clearer cause-and-effect links and refer explicitly to the point being developed so readers can follow how each example supports your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to discuss recruitment and fairness, including “marital status,” “discrimination,” “problem-solving skills,” and “productivity.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “different roles” and “conflict at the workplace.” However, the range is limited in places, and inaccurate word choice, collocation, and spelling are noticeable. Examples include “prefect” for “perfect,” “demads,” and “contributes into discrimination”; “fit for different roles” is also not idiomatic in this context. These errors do not prevent the overall message from being understood, but they reduce precision and sometimes make the phrasing awkward. Build a bank of accurate collocations for employment and practise checking spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession in the introduction (“Although I believe…”) and a conditional structure (“If a person is married…”). Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation. For example, “this also contributes into discrimination” has an incorrect grammatical pattern, while “although single person is judged” needs an article and a clearer sentence connection. The long sentence beginning “If a person is married” also combines several claims in a way that makes the relationships difficult to follow. Aim to control complex sentences by expressing one main relationship at a time, and check articles, subject–verb agreement, and sentence boundaries.

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