Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowdays, some employers ask job applicants to provide personal information, including theri hobbies,intrest and marital status. While some people believe that such details can be usfull when selecting employees, others argue that they are irrelevant to the recruitment process. In my opnionn certain personal information can be healpfull, but employes should mainly focus on candidates skill and qualification.

On the one hand, asking about hobbies and interests can help employes understand applicants personalties and identify usfull skill. for example, some who participates in team suports may have good teamworks and communication abilities, while a person who enjoy volunteering may demonstrate responsibility and compassion.furthermore, discussing personal interests during an interview can help candidates fell more comfortable and allow employes to understand them beyound their academic achivements

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response introduces the topic and gives a clear, though brief, opinion: personal information can be helpful, but skills and qualifications should remain the main focus. It also begins to explain why hobbies may matter, using teamwork and volunteering as examples. However, the task asks you to discuss both views, and the opposing view is not developed; marital status is mentioned but not considered. The essay also stops before completing its argument and contains only 125 words, well below the required 250. As a result, the task is addressed only minimally. To improve, explain why some applicants or employers consider these details irrelevant, develop your own position with reasons, and add a conclusion supported by relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

There is a basic, understandable structure: an introduction states the issue and your position, followed by a paragraph beginning “On the one hand” that gives supporting examples. Linking expressions such as “While,” “for example,” and “furthermore” help show relationships between ideas. However, the response ends during this first supporting point, so there is no progression to the opposing view or a conclusion. The paragraph also combines several ideas without fully developing their connections. Build a separate paragraph for each view, use clear topic sentences, and finish by returning to your opinion. This would create a more complete and logically balanced progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “marital status,” “recruitment process,” “communication abilities,” and “academic achievements.” These choices show an attempt to discuss employment and personal qualities rather than relying only on very general language. However, spelling errors and inaccurate word forms are frequent enough to distract the reader, as in “Nowdays,” “intrest,” “usfull,” and “opnionn.” Some collocations are also awkward, such as “good teamworks”; “teamwork” is normally uncountable. Aim to check spelling carefully and choose precise, natural phrases. You could also broaden the vocabulary by discussing privacy, discrimination, job-related qualities, and professional qualifications.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response attempts both simple and more complex sentence forms. For example, the opening uses a “While” clause to introduce contrasting views, and the sentence beginning “for example” explains a possible link between hobbies and workplace skills. Meaning is generally recoverable, but errors in sentence construction and punctuation reduce accuracy. In “some who participates,” the subject and verb do not agree, and “a person who enjoy” also needs a singular verb. The sentence beginning “furthermore” should start with a capital letter, and the final sentence needs a full stop. Practise checking subject–verb agreement, sentence boundaries, and capitalization, while continuing to use subordinate clauses to express relationships between ideas.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.