Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowadays, when we applying for a job we should mention our personal things because employers ask people about their personal information. Sometimes they ask about their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people think that this information may be relevent and useful while others think that information not necessary for a job. In my opinion, mentioning their personal information is helpful for the professional life.

When applying for a job Individuals should complete a application. There are both personal and professional information should include for the application. Employers consern about both professional and personal information when selecting employees.

On the one hand, mentioning private details sch as preferances and civil status are very important for get a short summary about someone. Employers can easily decide that someone is suitable or not suitable for that profession. They can analyse data simply from using the application. Also they can arange worker's leaves and other benefits.

On the other hand, some Individuals think that mentioning private inform on job application can make some troubles. They think that are unnecessary details for a profession. people think that we should not open our private things infront of our Employers and co workers and it is important to keep personal and work place things separately. One of my friend said that she do not even tell their coworkers about her mariatal status. She think that information are not important for the office.

In conclusion, I think that giving our information to the workplace can be more beneficial for our working life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both views and give a clear opinion that personal information is helpful, with relevant points about assessing suitability and arranging leave. However, the discussion is only partly developed: the benefits are asserted rather than explained with a specific example, while the opposing view is supported mainly by one friend’s preference. Clarify when personal details are genuinely relevant and why marital status may be private or unrelated to job performance. The conclusion repeats your position without adding a final reason. The response contains 247 words, so it is three words below the 250-word minimum; the 13 words copied from the prompt are not counted.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two paragraphs presenting contrasting views, and a conclusion. The signposts “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help readers follow the discussion, and the main points are generally grouped by viewpoint. However, progression within paragraphs is limited, and some links between ideas are unclear, as in “There are both personal and professional information should include for the application.” The conclusion largely repeats the introduction. Develop each paragraph around a clear main claim, then explain it and connect it to an example. More precise referencing would also help readers understand who “they” and “we” refer to.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “personal information,” “professional life,” “suitable,” and “benefits.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions such as “civil status” and “private details.” However, the range is limited and several spelling errors or inaccurate word choices are noticeable, including “relevent,” “consern,” “arange,” and “mariatal.” Some phrases are awkward or imprecise, such as “personal things” and “open our private things.” These choices sometimes make the meaning less clear. Build a more accurate set of employment-related terms and check spelling, word forms, and natural collocations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast between the two views and a relative clause in “a friend said that she…”. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. Examples include “when we applying” instead of a correctly formed clause, “a application,” “There are both…information should include,” and “she do not…She think.” Agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction need more consistent control. Practise building accurate basic sentences first, then add subordinate clauses using patterns such as “Employers may ask for these details because…” and check each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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