Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

While hiring an employee, recruiment commitee often seek information about personal life like one's hobbies or favourite leisure activities and marital status. Many people believe, it is necessary as these can help the employer understand how the personality of the person. I think, facts like free time activities are relavent to some extend as these attributes reflect their character, but information like marital status is unnecessary to determind a person's work ability.

To begin with,many enterprises ask personal questions because they look for qualities that are not merely mentioned in the resume. An individual's outside work activities can tell a lot of one's everyday life. If an employee prefers to take part in group sports during his leisure, it emphasizes that he is good with communication and can offer better managerial skills. In addition to, knowing one's hobby can lead to better understanding among co-workers. those, who share interests in the same fields, can take in actitivies that lead long-term friendship and create a sense of belonging.

However, I believe fact about one's marital situation are irrelavant and these information might create bias stereotypes. Many time employees' are ask questions regarding child care, marriage to understand about their family responsibilites, work abilities , and sking a staff about her family circumstances like to determine how someone might perform at his job is unjustified. Hiring committee should solely rely on the abilities of the person rather than their situation.

In conclusion, in my opinion knowing about a person's hobbies and personal interests are justified to determind about his interpersonal skills, but questions about personal relationship is irrelevant as these infromation doesn't help to understandone' s

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You discuss both perspectives and make your own position clear: hobbies may reveal interpersonal qualities, whereas marital status should not influence hiring. The examples about group sports and shared interests are relevant, and the point about family circumstances creating bias addresses why marital information may be inappropriate. However, the two sides are not developed equally. The benefits of asking about hobbies are explained with examples, while the opposing view—that some personal information can be relevant and useful—is only briefly represented, and the marital-status argument is not fully clarified. The conclusion also ends mid-sentence, so it does not complete the summary of your view. Develop the opposing case more explicitly and finish with a complete conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two positions, and a concluding paragraph. Transitions such as “To begin with,” “However,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow, and the examples generally appear in the relevant paragraph. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent overall arrangement and shows some of the stronger control associated with more flexible cohesion. However, some links are awkward or unclear, as in “In addition to, knowing one's hobby,” and “those, who share interests” has an unclear reference and unnecessary interruption. The final sentence is incomplete, which weakens the ending. Use linking phrases accurately, make pronoun references explicit, and ensure the conclusion forms a complete thought.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of task-relevant vocabulary, including “marital status,” “managerial skills,” “family responsibilities,” “bias,” and “sense of belonging.” These choices help express the main ideas, and you attempt some less common language. However, noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, for example “recruiment,” “relavent,” “irrelavant,” and “determind.” Some combinations are also unnatural or unclear, such as “take in activities” and “understand how the personality of the person.” The range is adequate for discussing the topic, but accuracy and natural collocation are inconsistent. Check spelling carefully and learn common word partnerships, such as “participate in activities” and “assess a candidate’s suitability,” to make your meaning clearer and more fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional phrasing (“If an employee prefers…”) and a contrast introduced by “However.” The main argument is usually understandable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity and control. For example, “Many people believe, it is necessary” has incorrect punctuation and sentence structure, while “these information doesn't help” has a number-agreement problem. In “Many time employees' are ask questions,” the plural form, verb construction, and possessive use are faulty. The final sentence is also incomplete. Work on subject–verb agreement, countable and uncountable nouns, verb forms, and sentence boundaries. Proofreading each sentence for a complete subject and verb would improve accuracy while preserving your attempts at complex structures.

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