Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-24
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.
What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
One of our conspicuous trend of todays world is colossal upsurge in the number of people contending that the visiting to hot places such as Sahara desert and Antarctic are fun as well as danger of life. I vehemently believe that, exploring such places can be good but also need to aware about the consequences.
To commence with the advantages for travelers how explore such places, firstly they can explore and enjoy the beauty of nature and can feel very closely. secondly, they can earn money with their own vlogs as every one like to see the vlog before going on their holidays. for example, the recent reports claim that 81% population of America or 73% Canadian see the places through internet vlogs and reviews before explore them in real. Thirdly, because of tourists many places earn their bread and butter, and the GDP of the country also got effected just because of tourism.
On the other side there are some disadvantages of this trend is, some times in order to explore the new places the travelors have to face the uncertain cursumstances such as attack of wild animals result of life lose. Apart from this, the UV radiation is very high in such areas, people who are not useto with such hot environment can suffer gut problem or skin cancer.
At last according to my opinion finding new places and exploring such hot places can help them to see the world with different view but also can harmful for health with changing of environment.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme environments. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention vlogging and economic benefits, the explanation remains superficial. For instance, the point about GDP is mentioned but not clearly linked to the specific context of extreme tourism. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments lack depth and specific examples related to the Sahara or Antarctic. To improve, ensure each point is fully extended with a clear explanation of 'why' or 'how' it impacts the tourist or the destination.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use basic cohesive devices like 'To commence with', 'secondly', and 'On the other side'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and some transitions are awkward, such as 'At last according to my opinion'. The referencing is occasionally unclear, and the logical progression within paragraphs could be smoother. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one without relying on repetitive structures.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'conspicuous', 'upsurge', and 'vehemently'. However, there are several instances of incorrect word choice and collocation, such as 'danger of life' instead of 'life-threatening' and 'earn their bread and butter' which is an idiom that does not fit the formal tone of an IELTS essay. There are also minor errors like 'useto' (used to) and 'cursumstances' (circumstances). Expanding your vocabulary to include more precise, academic collocations will help improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'One of our conspicuous trend' (should be 'trends'), 'the visiting to hot places' (should be 'visiting hot places'), and 'can also can harmful' (should be 'can also be harmful'). Subject-verb agreement and article usage are inconsistent throughout the text. While you attempt complex sentences, the high frequency of errors suggests a need to focus on basic grammatical accuracy and proofreading your work for common slips.
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