Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Unquestionably, every coin has two sides and so are the people. Society’s people are divided into two groups and therefore, visiting remote locations on your holidays has become a point of debate among people. This essay will compare both of the opinions along with my view which is in the favour of former view will be discussed in a conclusion.

Initiating with the points supporting first school of thoughts, firstly, people are exploring and love traveling to remote locations where they could not be reached by outside world via phone. These locations enhances people’s chain of thoughts and connect them with nature. It gives tremendous amount of peace and relives stress from their professional and personal life. Secondly, it also represents the challenges early generations has faced, and how they survived in extreme conditions without the use of technology. In fact, recent studies has shown that young couples are leaning towards going on holidays to places as Sahara desert, the Antarctic, Ireland, Norway and many more. As a consequence, it’s boosting the economy of local town and countries as footfall has increased exponentially.

On its contrasting side, the disconnected mobile services might trigger stress for relatives, who’re waiting to hear back from them. In some situations, it also causes unwanted events to occur as there is no way of communication, if you’re trapped somewhere. People also believes that, social media platforms has played a crucial role as people wants to post pictures and show it to entire world.

To conclude, I would say that, connecting with nature and spending quality time remotely can overflow the reasons to not to visit these places. However, it will be depended upon the mindsets of people that which view they are in favour of.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting remote locations. However, the introduction is somewhat confusing; it mentions comparing two opinions and then states a preference for the 'former view,' but the body paragraphs do not clearly distinguish between these or maintain a consistent argument. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat under-developed. For instance, the point about 'early generations' is vague and lacks a clear connection to the benefits for modern tourists. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully explained with specific examples and that your position is clearly stated and maintained throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'Initiating with,' 'Firstly,' 'Secondly,' and 'On its contrasting side.' However, some of these transitions feel mechanical or slightly unnatural. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the introduction where the 'former view' is mentioned but not explicitly defined. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the flow between sentences could be improved to make the argument more cohesive. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the benefits and disadvantages.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with some attempts at less common items like 'exponentially' and 'footfall.' However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and collocation errors, such as 'first school of thoughts' (should be 'first school of thought') and 'relives stress' (should be 'relieves stress'). The phrase 'every coin has two sides and so are the people' is also somewhat illogical in this context. While the meaning is clear, the range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, and the errors in word choice prevent a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors throughout, including subject-verb agreement issues such as 'recent studies has shown' (should be 'have shown') and 'People also believes' (should be 'believe'). Additionally, there are punctuation and article errors, such as 'to places as Sahara desert' (should be 'to places such as the Sahara desert'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to suggest a lack of control over more complex structures. Focusing on proofreading for basic agreement and article usage would be beneficial.

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