Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In today's era travelling has became a hobby of many individuals. Many travellers are going to various regions that has harsh weather, like Antarctica or Sahara desert. This essay will shed some light on this merits and demerits of this notion.

To begin with, some key benefits of visiting area having difficult conditions is that, it will give an opportunity to tourists to explore different atmospheres and will get knowledge about it. To explicit, Tourists who travels different countries often get bored with same climatic conditions and lifestyles, but when they visit places having harsh weather conditions like extremely cold or hot. Then they feel how much temperature can vary across opposite side of the world. Moreover, tourists will get to learn about how natural things occur there, which they can share with other people in the world. For example, few years ago when one tourist came back from Antarctica shared his experience that how it was also once used to be part of same world land.

On the flip side, there are some disadvantages to of tourists visiting areas with extreme weather conditions as the amount of money they spend on going to far away places could be used for some useful thing. A lot of money is used to make a tour to such places which do not have important effect on something, which can be used to educate people who do not get chance to do so. Furthermore, going to places with difficult environmental conditions can prove to be life threatening, where getting emergency help is also impossible or time taking. for example, last year one a girl found dead on Antarctic land found that she was dead about 4 days ago but due to lack of emergency help, nobody found her before.

In conclusion, travelling of tourists to places with hot or cold temperature can come with a lot of chances to gain knowledge, but comes along with some life loosing threats. So, proper precautions should be arranged accordingly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme environments. The ideas are relevant, such as gaining knowledge and the risks of life-threatening situations. However, the development is somewhat limited; for instance, the point about the financial cost could be more deeply explored beyond just suggesting the money could be used elsewhere. The position is clear throughout, and the essay covers all parts of the prompt. To improve, you should aim to provide more nuanced arguments and ensure that your examples are more clearly linked to the main points to demonstrate a more sophisticated level of critical thinking.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct focus. There is a logical progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use some cohesive devices like 'To begin with', 'On the flip side', and 'Furthermore', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are a bit mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is slightly disrupted by awkward phrasing, such as 'To explicit' or 'due to lack of emergency help'. Improving the variety and naturalness of your linking words will help your writing flow more smoothly and achieve a higher band score.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to discuss the topic, using terms like 'climatic conditions', 'environmental conditions', and 'precautions'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'life loosing threats' (instead of 'life-threatening') and 'make a tour'. Some phrasing is also repetitive or slightly unnatural, such as 'natural things occur'. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and expanding your range of academic vocabulary to avoid relying on simpler, less accurate expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('travelling has became', 'regions that has harsh weather') and article usage ('one a girl found dead'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentence fragments and run-on sentences. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to affect the overall clarity. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that your complex sentences are grammatically sound will significantly improve your score.

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