Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

There has been increasing number of travelers who place greater emphasis on exploring places with extreme challenging conditions such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. Although this approach brings some benefits to the tourists, it can also lead to several drawbacks. This essay will discuss both the sides in the following paragraphs.

To begin with the positive side, visiting places where conditions are dangerous can improve overall surviving skills. In other words, it allows visitors to stay alert and to keep them safe from potential danger that may arise. To be more specific, when staying in the forest overnight, there is high chances of getting attacked by wild animals or may have to face heavy rain or snow depending on the region. By facing such challenges, travelers' surviving abilities improve significantly. For instance, a very famous personality, Bear Grills, is considered as one of the best survivors in the world simply because he visits such places frequently.

Talking about the negative side, traveling to dangerous places can have a detrimental impact on the health. To further elaborate, extreme weather conditions can result in severe health issues such as fever and cold. For example, as per a recent study conducted by medical students, a lot of travelers who visit such places often get sickness. Moreover, it can result in getting serious injuries or death depending on the circumstance of the situation. To give an example, recently a group of people went missing who attempted to climb the Mount Everest during winter.

To conclude, although visiting places where conditions are difficult can result in improvement in the surviving abilities, it can also lead to severe health issues or permanent injuries.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme locations. The ideas are relevant, such as the development of survival skills and the risks to physical health. However, the development of these points is somewhat limited. For example, the argument regarding survival skills is supported by a brief mention of Bear Grylls, but it lacks depth in explaining how this translates to the average tourist. Similarly, the negative impacts are mentioned, but the explanation remains somewhat superficial. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the 'why' and 'how' of your arguments with more detailed reasoning or nuanced examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with', 'In other words', and 'Moreover', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical or repetitive. The referencing is generally clear, though the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that the progression of ideas is smoother. Overall, the structure is coherent and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task. You use some topic-specific terms like 'extreme challenging conditions', 'detrimental impact', and 'severe health issues'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'there is high chances' (should be 'there are high chances') and 'get sickness' (should be 'become ill' or 'contract illnesses'). The range of vocabulary is sufficient to communicate your points, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. Expanding your repertoire of academic collocations would be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'There has been increasing number' (missing article 'an'), 'surviving skills' (should be 'survival skills'), and 'a lot of travelers... often get sickness'. These errors do not impede communication, but they are noticeable. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, article usage, and the correct formation of noun phrases. Increasing the variety of complex structures while ensuring they remain error-free will help you achieve a higher score.

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