Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.
What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Nowadays, a lot of individuals keep visiting places with harsh atmosphere.
It is a known fact that researcher and scientist tend to visit places where many people have not been able to reach, the reason may not be far from the fact that these set of individuals are looking to a explore in a more natural habitat where people have not been regularly .discoveries are made in such environments.
One of the major challenges of visitors to such area is always prone to issues like air pollution and dehydration which can cause sickness and may lad to death.
It is imperative to not
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which severely limits your ability to address the prompt. You have failed to develop the ideas regarding both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme environments. The essay is incomplete, ending abruptly mid-sentence. Because the task is not fully addressed and the length is insufficient, the response cannot be evaluated as a complete essay. To improve, you must ensure you provide a full introduction, body paragraphs that explore both sides of the argument with supporting examples, and a clear conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The text lacks a clear structure or logical progression. While there is a brief attempt at paragraphing, the ideas are fragmented and the essay is incomplete. There is a lack of cohesive devices to link sentences or ideas effectively. For example, the transition between the mention of researchers and the challenges of tourism is abrupt and lacks a logical connector. To achieve a higher score, you need to organize your ideas into clear paragraphs with a logical flow, using linking words like 'furthermore', 'however', or 'consequently' to guide the reader through your argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is quite basic and repetitive. Phrases like 'a lot of individuals' and 'harsh atmosphere' are functional but lack the precision expected at higher levels. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'looking to a explore in a more natural habitat' and 'these set of individuals'. To improve, you should aim to use a wider range of topic-specific vocabulary related to tourism and extreme environments, and focus on using words in their correct grammatical context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The grammar contains several errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'researcher and scientist tend to' (should be plural), 'the reason may not be far from the fact that' (wordy and awkward), and 'may lad to death' (spelling error). The sentence structures are mostly simple, and the attempt at a complex sentence at the end is incomplete. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct spelling, and practicing more complex sentence structures while ensuring they are grammatically accurate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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