Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Some people says that exploring new places such as Sahara desert and the Antarctic are becoming more popular now a days . Visiting such places have pros and cons in my opinion cons overweigh pros which i will discuss in my upcoming paragraphs .

To begin with the disadvantages , both deserts are totally different from each others one is extremely hot and the other one is coldest . Moreover , these places have short of food supplies and other facilities such as medical help and transportation however leads to life threat . In addition , visiting these places cost so high .These isolated places needs everything that is not possible to carry on a trip . For a site , on Antarctica visitors report that they hardly spend time over there because of the snow and chilly waves they could not come out from there tents and got lungs infection too.

Secondly ,for advantages people can see new part of these deserts and can make videos and can click pictures . They can guide others about safe visiting hence people can make sure before making any plan to visit there.

In conclusion ,though cons are overweigh the pros still we can not overlook the beauty of nature people loved to capture in their cameras

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme environments. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which limits the depth of development. While you state a clear position that the disadvantages outweigh the benefits, the arguments are somewhat superficial. For instance, the point about 'medical help' and 'transportation' is relevant, but the example regarding Antarctica is anecdotal and lacks sufficient detail to fully support the argument. To improve, you must expand your ideas with more thorough explanations and examples to meet the length requirement and provide a more comprehensive analysis of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'For a site' is an incorrect transition, and the phrase 'however leads to life threat' is grammatically awkward and fails to connect ideas logically. The progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the second paragraph where the transition between the lack of facilities and the specific example of Antarctica is abrupt. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words correctly and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally limited and repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'good' or 'bad' (implied) and struggle with collocations. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'short of food supplies' (should be 'a shortage of') and 'cost so high' (should be 'are very expensive'). The phrase 'chilly waves' is also an inaccurate collocation for weather conditions. To reach a higher band, you should aim to incorporate more precise, topic-specific vocabulary related to travel, tourism, and environmental challenges, and pay closer attention to how words are used together in natural English phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede communication. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('Some people says', 'these places needs'), incorrect pluralization ('each others'), and awkward sentence structures ('visiting these places cost so high'). The use of punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary spaces before commas and periods. While you attempt some complex sentences, they are often marred by errors. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and correct article usage before attempting more complex grammatical structures.

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