Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowdays, most of the people like to discover new places especially the gen Z. They want to explore different places to show their friends and post on social media. This is very debatable question that why so many tourists love to visit places like Sahara desert or the Antarctic where the conditions are very difficult. What are the advantages and disadvantages of visit places like this. In this essay, we will discuss both pros and cons.

To begin with, the biggest advantage is experience. Most of the people go to places like this for their experience like what is there and why it is so special and interesting place. For travellers this is always in their bucket list. For instance, there is so many influencers who make travel videos and go to different places. In Punjab there is Travel couple who almost visit 89 countries.

However, the disadvantage is expense. If people wanna go to places like this they should need a lot of money. that's why not all people experience this.The tickets are so expensive. Other people watch video of the tourists who visit there make them feel to go also but they are not able to go due to lack of money which is very sad.

For example, there is recent news that a child watch a video of Antarctica and ask his parents to go there but his parents can't afford and they denied. So, he leaves his house. This is very heart breaking.

In conclusion , I believe that it's up to person who wanna go or who not.There is both advantages and disadvantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme locations. However, the development of ideas is quite limited. The 'benefits' section focuses primarily on the desire for experience and social media validation, while the 'disadvantages' section focuses on financial cost and a specific, somewhat anecdotal example about a child. The arguments lack depth and analytical rigor. To improve, you should expand on the broader implications, such as the environmental impact of tourism in fragile ecosystems or the personal growth gained from overcoming physical challenges. The conclusion is also very brief and does not effectively summarize the main points or provide a final thought.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is quite basic and sometimes repetitive (e.g., 'For example', 'To begin with'). There are instances where the flow between sentences is disjointed, particularly in the second paragraph where the transition from the 'Travel couple' example to the 'expense' paragraph feels abrupt. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the sentence 'Other people watch video of the tourists who visit there make them feel to go also', which is grammatically awkward and hinders the logical progression of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. You rely on simple, repetitive phrasing such as 'places like this' and 'go to'. There are some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'This is very debatable question' (should be 'a very debatable question') and 'they denied' (should be 'they refused' or 'they declined'). To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more sophisticated vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'fragile ecosystems', 'financial constraints', or 'adventurous pursuits', rather than relying on informal or overly simple language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'there is so many influencers'), missing articles (e.g., 'it's up to person'), and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'make them feel to go also'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and periods. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for small errors would significantly improve your score.

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