Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-13
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.
What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
These days, many visitors are exploring places where weather conditions are dangerous, such as Sahara desert or the Antarctic. This essay will explicate the advantages and disadvantages for people who visit these types of places.
One major benefit of visiting such places is that it is a unique and unforgettable experience for the life time.People can enjoy the beauty of environment so closely. For example, In Antarctic, tourists can see the Glaciers, Penguins and wildlife. Such tours increase people's knowledge about environment and wildlife. In addition, It increase the job opportunities for the local tour guides and hotels because visitors need some accomodation to stay and a guider who can explain them everything in detail.
However, it has some disadvantages. Firstly, these places can be dangerous for tourists because of weather conditions. Tourists may suffer from extremely high temperature in Sahara desert and cold in Antarctic and these places can be lack of medical facilities. Secondly, Visits on these places can be expensive because of the limited facilities available there. Another concern is environment. Many visitors can cause pollution and disturb wildlife with their actions that is harmful for the nature.
In conclusion, visiting difficult places can give the people an excitement and unique experience that will increase their knowledge about nature and wildlife, but the extreme weather conditions can be dangerous for their lives and overcrowd of tourists can disturb the nature and its beauty. So, people should travel responsibly and follow the safety rules.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of visiting extreme environments. However, the essay falls slightly short of the 250-word minimum requirement, which negatively impacts the task achievement score. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat underdeveloped; for instance, the point about 'job opportunities' is mentioned but not fully explored in the context of extreme tourism. The position is clear throughout, but the lack of depth and the failure to meet the length requirement prevent a higher score. To improve, ensure you expand on your arguments with more detailed explanations or additional examples to comfortably exceed the word count.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs for benefits and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'One major benefit', 'In addition', 'However', and 'Firstly' are used to guide the reader. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel repetitive. The referencing is generally clear, though some sentences are slightly disjointed. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensuring that the logical progression between sentences is smoother and less formulaic.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks sophistication. You use basic terms like 'dangerous', 'beautiful', and 'good', which are sufficient but do not demonstrate a wide range. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'explicate the advantages' (explain is more natural) and 'overcrowd of tourists' (overcrowding is the correct noun form). To improve, try to incorporate more precise, topic-specific vocabulary related to tourism and environmental impact, and pay closer attention to word forms and collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('In Antarctic', 'in Sahara desert'), subject-verb agreement issues ('It increase'), and awkward phrasing ('these places can be lack of'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some spacing issues after commas. To improve, focus on mastering article usage and ensuring subject-verb agreement. Increasing the variety of complex structures while maintaining accuracy will help you achieve a higher band score.
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