Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic.
What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Nowadays , Number of tourists are visiting destinations where climate conditions are intense, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. visiting difficult has both benefits and disadvantages. I will explain in upcoming paragraphs.
To commence with, extreme tourism can improve people confident. In other words, tourists are challenge themself to increase their confidence and cope with unfamiliar and extreme conditions. for intense, Sahara desert and Antarctic their has extreme heat and little water so, some people like to see how they can handle that. therefore, its build people confident and successfully overcoming these challenges can make them more independent .
However, their has number of disadvantages as well , to explicate it extreme weather comes with health and safety risks. some time people get dehydration which make them sick they can't handle it . secondly, large number of tourists can disturb wildlife. for example , few tourist does not respect wildlife they try to bugging them and hurt. which disturb their life and sometime they also back attack them.
To conclusion, although tourism can improve confidence and make them independent. yet, they disturb wildlife to bugging them and its effect on their health because of extreme heat and weather conditions.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both the benefits and disadvantages of extreme tourism, but the development of ideas is limited due to the short length. The essay falls significantly below the 250-word requirement, which prevents a full exploration of the topic. While the prompt asks for reasons and examples, the arguments provided are quite brief and lack depth. For instance, the point about wildlife is mentioned but not fully explained in terms of the broader impact. To improve, you must expand your supporting points with more detailed explanations and specific examples to meet the word count and demonstrate a more thorough engagement with the task.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'To commence with' and 'To conclusion' are used, but the latter is grammatically incorrect. The flow between sentences is sometimes disjointed, making the progression of ideas feel repetitive. Referencing is also inconsistent, such as the use of 'their' instead of 'there' and unclear pronoun usage. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words correctly and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that connects logically to the next.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary range is limited and often repetitive. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'improve people confident' instead of 'improve people's confidence' and 'bugging them' which is too informal for an IELTS essay. The word 'intense' is used where 'extreme' or 'harsh' would be more appropriate. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of precision and the reliance on basic vocabulary restrict the score. You should aim to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to travel, environment, and ethics to demonstrate a wider range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of reading. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'few tourist does not respect'), incorrect word forms (e.g., 'improve people confident'), and sentence structure (e.g., 'some time people get dehydration which make them sick'). Punctuation is also problematic, with missing commas and incorrect sentence boundaries. The range of structures is limited, relying mostly on simple sentences. To improve, you need to focus on basic grammatical accuracy, particularly with verb tenses, pluralisation, and the correct use of articles.
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